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Get a New Daddy

The Whitest Kids U'Know2007Season 1Episode 1
The Whitest Kids U'KnowWKUK
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.

The setup

A cheerful acoustic troubadour serenades a circle of children with a sing-along about escaping strict parents by getting Dad hauled off by the police.

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Community rating

– / 10

The funny people

Meet the cast. 1

The premise

Here’s the bit.

Trevor Moore, in a dark suit with an acoustic guitar against a white backdrop, sings a bright children's sing-along aimed at kids who resent bedtimes, chores and homework. His solution is monstrous: falsely accuse your father of molesting you, and the police will take him away. Cutaway music-video scenes show a boy whispering to his teacher, the father being dragged out of the house by officers, and the child lounging with snacks and late-night freedom. When the replacement stepfather turns out to be uncool, the song advises framing him too with planted photos, and the cycle repeats. The final verse turns to the mother, who collapses under the string of supposed predators and is institutionalized, so the kids can trade her in as well, ending with Moore and a group of children dancing through the cheerful chorus.

Behind the scenes

The people who made it.

A little extra

Notes from the archive.

The song closes the series' first episode, which premiered on Fuse on March 20, 2007. It had already appeared, as track 5, on the troupe's self-titled comedy album released by What Are Records? on September 5, 2006, a collection of songs later featured in the show's first season.

ScriptEnglish · 13 turns

Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.

  1. 00:12

    Singer

    Hey hey there kids i see you're feeling blue parents push around and tell you what to do dad makes you clean your room and go to bed instead of watch tv you have to do homework instead and

  2. 00:24

    Singer

    i know it makes you angry and you're full of rage well let me tell you a secret i wish i knew at your age next time you're angry and you wanna fight back just tell your teacher daddy likes to play with your sack

  3. 00:34

    Singer

    and you can get a new daddy get a new daddy police will take the old one away in a caddy You can get a new daddy, get a new daddy Stay up real late, kick back and light up a fatty

  4. 00:46

    Singer

    You can get a new daddy, get a new daddy In a couple of months you'll probably get a new daddy Get a new daddy, get a new daddy In a couple of months you'll probably get a new daddy

  5. 00:57

    Singer

    Now for a little while your new daddy's cool Buys your things and tries real hard to bond with you Lets you eat candy and play video games But your friends at school all think that he's kind of lame

  6. 01:08

    Singer

    Now you can't have your buddies making fun of your dad And all in all this one is really not so bad But you think you might like to try once more Take naked Polaroids of yourself and leave them in his sock drawer

  7. 01:20

    Singer

    And you can get a new daddy, get a new daddy Stay up real late, kick back and light up a fatty You can get a new daddy, get a new daddy Police will take the old one away in a caddy

  8. 01:31

    Singer

    You can get a new daddy, get a new daddy In a couple of months you'll probably get a new daddy Get a new daddy, get a new daddy In a couple of months you'll probably get a new daddy

  9. 01:42

    Singer

    Now your mom's wondering what's wrong with her And why she keeps attracting men that are dirty pervs She has a breakdown and cries and cries And after a while she's institutionalized

  10. 01:54

    Singer

    Then you can get a new mommy, get a new mommy New brother and sister, a new house and new mommy Get a new mommy, get a new mommy A new brother, new sister, a new house and new mommy

  11. 02:05

    Singer

    Get a new mommy, get a new daddy Stay up real late, kick back and spark up a fatty You can get a new daddy, get a new daddy Police will take the old one away in a caddy

  12. 02:16

    Singer

    You can get a new daddy, get a new mommy A new brother and sister, a new house and new mommy Get a new mommy, get a new daddy Stay up real late, kick back and spark up a fatty

  13. 02:27

    Singer

    You can get a new daddy, get a new daddy In a couple of months you'll probably get a new daddy

The rabbit hole continues

One more couldn’t hurt.

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