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Washington's Dream 2
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.
The setup
Watch on YouTube
Watch onYouTube
The premise
Here’s the bit.
As his troops cross the Delaware River in 1776, George Washington reassures them with a vision of their independent nation’s language. He proposes inconsistent spelling, special number names and a confusing divide between animals and the foods made from them. A soldier’s questions about hot dogs earn him an order to leave the boat.
Washington’s plans expand to money, school grades and holiday customs, while his men struggle to make sense of them. His promises of freedom lead a Black soldier to ask when slavery will end, and Washington’s evasive answer leaves him calling for clarification.
The funny people
Meet the cast. 5
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
We shall call it a dozen.
Get out of the boat.
Buy a mattress, of course.
Behind the scenes
The people who made it.
Mike DiCenzo
Writer
Mikey Day
Writer
Streeter Seidell
Writer
Liz Patrick
Director
A little extra
Notes from the archive.
The boat was enlarged during rehearsals to give the performers more room and allow clearer camera shots.
Script
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.
- 00:04
Soldier
I wonder how many British troops await us on the other shore.
- 00:09
Soldier
Must be thousands.
- 00:10
Soldier
Is there any chance we will win this war?
- 00:13
George Washington
Of course.
- 00:17
General Washington.
- 00:18
Soldier
General Washington, we apologize.
- 00:22
George Washington
No need. I am fearful as well. But we will live through the battle ahead because we fight to control our own destiny.
- 00:31
Yeah!
- 00:32
George Washington
To create our own nation. and to do our own thing with the English language.
- 00:43
Soldier
Our own thing, sir?
- 00:46
George Washington
Yes. I dream that one day our great nation will have a word for the number 12. We shall call it a dozen.
- 00:58
Soldier
And what other number is what we have a word for?
- 01:02
George Washington
None. Only 12 shall have its own word because we are free men and we will be free to spell some words two different ways
- 01:14
Soldier
which words sir
- 01:16
George Washington
donut and the name Jeff
- 01:26
Soldier
what are the two ways to spell Jeff sir
- 01:31
George Washington
it's the short way with a J and the stupid way with a G and this is what we fight men to extend these liberties to all Americans
- 01:47
Soldier
including men like men of color like myself?
- 01:52
George Washington
Well, we also have two names for animals. One when they are alive, and a different one when they become food. So cows will be beef, pigs will be pork.
- 02:11
Soldier
And chickens, sir?
- 02:14
George Washington
That one stays. Chickens are chicken. And we will create our own foods and name them what we want like the hamburger
- 02:28
Soldier
made of ham sir
- 02:30
George Washington
well if it only were that simple a hamburger is made of beef just as a buffalo wing is made of chicken but fear not men a hot dog will not be made of dogs
- 02:48
Soldier
what is it What's it made of, sir?
- 02:52
George Washington
Nobody knows.
- 02:58
Soldier
Shouldn't we know what's in a hot dog?
- 03:01
George Washington
Get out.
- 03:03
Soldier
I'm sorry?
- 03:04
George Washington
Get out of the boat.
- 03:07
Soldier
Just go over the side?
- 03:09
George Washington
Yes, go.
- 03:10
Go, go.
- 03:17
George Washington
A real American would never want to know what's in a hot dog. Just as they will never know why our money is called the dollar.
- 03:25
Soldier
the dollar sir
- 03:27
George Washington
yeah and if you think I'm worthy put my portrait on the front of it
- 03:31
Soldier
and what shall be on the back sir
- 03:34
George Washington
everything all of it crazy stuff squiggles Latin words pyramid with a floating eye on top
- 03:45
Soldier
general I confess I'm very confused there seems to be no rhyme or reason to much of this
- 03:53
George Washington
do not Don't worry, soldier. For our great nation, we will create schools to teach our children our ways. The first year of school will be called kindergarten.
- 04:04
Soldier
And what will the second year be called?
- 04:07
George Washington
First grade. There will be 12 grades in all.
- 04:16
Soldier
Ah, so a dozen grades.
- 04:20
George Washington
That's, no. We don't use it that way. But the children, the children will not have to go to school every day. we will have our own holidays fourth of july flag day and president's day
- 04:35
Soldier
and what shall we do to honor our leaders on president's day sir
- 04:40
George Washington
buy a mattress of course these are my dreams for our nation men we fight this war to free the english language and free the american people
- 04:55
Soldier
all the American people. Sir, do you mean the slaves will be freed after this war?
- 05:04
George Washington
After a war.
- 05:07
Soldier
A war? But it's this war, right? It's this war, right?
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
More from across the archive.
