You're tuned to the good stuff
Taco Man
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.
The setup
Watch on Vimeo
Watch onVimeo
The premise
Here’s the bit.
A mail carrier named Jake slips a taco into a suburban mailbox, and the homeowner comes out to ask why his household gets tacos every day but no mail. Jake explains that his bag cannot hold both, then grows wounded when the man admits he would rather have his letters, even as a passing driver praises that day's tacos. Once he hears that missed bills could cost the homeowner his house, Jake concedes he cares far more about tacos than mail, quits on the spot and vanishes. The homeowner's wife, played by David Wain in a dress, joins him to wonder who will deliver the mail now, and the couple bid farewell as their mailbox wanders off.
The funny people
Meet the cast. 4
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
I'll level with you. These bags weren't designed for tacos.
Great tacos today, Jake.
I just don't have the same passion for delivering mail as I do for making and distributing tacos.
Goodbye, mailbox.
A little extra
Notes from the archive.
Splitsider ranked Taco Man second in its 2013 list of The State’s 20 best forgotten sketches, and writer Jake Fogelnest later chose it for the site’s 2015 Sketch Anatomy column.
Script
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.
- 00:12
Home owner
Hi there.
- 00:13
Jake
Howdy.
- 00:14
Home owner
You're our mailman, right?
- 00:15
Jake
Yes, sir.
- 00:16
Home owner
So you're the one who's been delivering tacos to us every day.
- 00:19
Jake
How do you like them?
- 00:20
Home owner
Oh, yeah, I love them. They're really, really great tacos. But I'll tell you, uh...
- 00:24
Jake, Jake.
- 00:25
Home owner
I'll tell you, Jake. The wife and I noticed that since the tacos started coming, the mail doesn't so much come as often or at all. Jake, what I'm getting at is, where's our mail?
- 00:43
Jake
yeah you want to know about the mail here's the mail situation I can't fit both the mail and the tacos in the bag it's hard enough fitting the tacos I'll level with you these bags weren't designed for tacos
- 01:00
Home owner
that's kind of what I'm getting at Jake
- 01:02
Jake
well don't tell me you're having a a problem with the tacos.
- 01:07
Home owner
Jake, I love the tacos, OK? They are maybe the best tacos I've ever had. It's just that, well, I think if I had to choose between the tacos and the mail, I'd have to choose the mail.
- 01:29
Jake
OK, I'm going to take a breath here. I'm afraid you might be saying something you don't quite mean. What I'm hearing is you don't want the tacos.
- 01:41
Driver
Great tacos today, Jake!
- 01:46
Home owner
Jake, you have to bring the mail. If we want tacos, we can always go to Taco Shack.
- 01:52
Jake
You're not going to eat that crap, are you?
- 01:54
Home owner
Jake, if I miss my mail, I don't pay my bills, and I could lose my house.
- 02:00
Jake
Oh, so your concern is the importance of getting your mail.
- 02:04
Home owner
Yes.
- 02:05
Jake
What? Bills and stuff?
- 02:07
Home owner
Yes, yes, yes.
- 02:08
Jake
Oh. You know, you're right. I'm sorry. I just don't have the same passion for delivering mail as I do for making and distributing tacos. You know, I quit. I don't know what I'm going to do.
- 02:22
Home owner
Wait, Jake. You could probably get a job selling tacos to customers on a voluntary basis.
- 02:28
Jake
Listen, I just died inside, and I don't really feel like talking.
- 02:38
Wife
So is he going to start delivering our mail now?
- 02:41
Home owner
I don't know, sweetheart, but I do know this. That was the longest conversation I've ever had.
- 02:51
Home owner
Goodbye, mailbox.
- 02:52
Wife
Bye-bye.
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
More from across the archive.
