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Nativity Play
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.
The setup
Watch on YouTube
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The premise
Here’s the bit.
At a church's Christmas Eve service, the host explains that the teen ministry's nativity play could not afford a camel, so a llama wearing a beanbag hump will play the part. Its handler, Terri, warns that the animal is in mating season and has given the wise men goggles, oven mitts and lettuce. Once the narrator, Carrie, starts the story, the wise men spend every scene shouting at the llama and dodging it, the gift props turn out to have been eaten, and the cast must hold up a blanket to hide the excited animal. By the manger scene the llama has chewed part of the baby doll, the wise men abandon the stage, and the congregation reacts with more curiosity than shock. The host wraps up with an apology and an offer of photos with the llama after the service.
The funny people
Meet the cast. 11
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
It turns out camels are a bit costly.
That's your criticism? Not the llama stuff?
Okay, so the llama ate some of the baby.
Script
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.
- 00:02
Host
And welcome to Rock Harbor's annual Christmas Eve service. In a few moments, Pastor Brendan will give another legendary Christmas sermon, and it's a crusher.
- 00:11
Kenan Thompson
Oh, I hope it's about Christmas.
- 00:14
Leslie Jones
Stop.
- 00:15
Host
But first, our teen ministry will present its annual nativity play. Now, I know that the whole town has been buzzing since we promised that there would be a live camel in our show, but it turns out camels are a bit costly. so the role of the Wiseman's camel will be played by a llama with a beanbag hump. And the llama's handler has a brief announcement.
- 00:39
Terri
Hi, folks. I'm Teri from Mayfair Llama Ranch. The llama's rutting right now, which means it's mating season. And basically, males get territorial and aggressive. So I've given the Wisemen protective wear.
- 00:53
Host
Right.
- 00:53
Terri
I also gave them lettuce for treats.
- 00:56
Host
Great.
- 00:56
Terri
Oh, and you may hear the term jade. That's a command which basically means, easy, boy.
- 01:02
Host
Thank you. Okay. Well, I'm sure you won't notice any of that. Now, I'd like to welcome our narrator, Carrie, who is our lead teen minister, to the stage.
- 01:13
Carrie
The Nativity. We take you now to the desert of Judea, where three wise men follow the North Star to Bethlehem.
- 01:24
Whoa, whoa.
- 01:25
Wise Man #2
God has told us to travel to Bethlehem to greet the arrival of the King of Kings.
- 01:31
Wise Man #3
Yo, Jaheed! Sorry, I thought he was gonna kick me again. Jaheed!
- 01:35
Wise Man #2
We shall travel there on this majestic camel.
- 01:38
Jaheed.
- 01:39
Wise Man #1
I shall brush our camel's coat so it is worthy of being seen by the Son of God.
- 01:46
Jaheed. Jaheed. Jaheed. Whoa, Jaheed. Jaheed! Jaheed! Jaheed, yo! Jaheed! Ja-ee! Ja-ee!
- 01:59
Wise Man #3
Hey, hey, can somebody else hold the rope? Jaheed. Uh, we will present these gifts to the young king.
- 02:08
Go, Jai! Jai! Jai. Jai. Jai.
- 02:11
Wise Man #3
To frankincense and myrrh. But the llama ate those props, so we don't have them. Jai. Come on, man.
- 02:18
Wise Man #2
Let us climb atop our camel and begin the journey,
- 02:21
Wise Man #3
which we're not gonna do, because the llama won't let us. Come on, now.
- 02:25
No, Jai. No, Jai. No, Jai. No, Jai. No, Jai. Jai. Jai, llama.
- 02:30
Kenan Thompson
I don't like that narrator girl.
- 02:33
Leslie Jones
That's your criticism? Not the llama stuff?
- 02:37
Kenan Thompson
Okay.
- 02:37
Host
Okay. Right. I see. Thank you. Um, so, Terry has informed me that in the next manger scene, our, uh, our wise men will be holding up a blanket, okay, to block an area of the llama's body that has become inappropriate, okay? Thank you.
- 02:54
Carrie
We take you now to Bethlehem, where the wise men have reached the manger.
- 02:59
Oh, my God.
- 03:00
Wise Man #1
Oh, my God, that's insane. Damn, Llama!
- 03:06
Yeah.
- 03:07
Wise Man #3
Yo, lo, a manger, and inside, Joseph and his wife, Mary, who birthed the newborn king. Yo, I'm sorry, everybody, but the Llama mad horny right now, yo.
- 03:21
Mary
Oh, glorious miracle. Born unto a virgin, the Son of God. Okay, so the llama ate some of the baby. What say you, dear Joseph?
- 03:36
Mary
Ryan, it's your line.
- 03:37
Whoa!
- 03:41
Joseph
Oh, Oh, um... The child is truly the son of God.
- 03:46
Leslie Jones
I don't blame him.
- 03:47
Kenan Thompson
I won't lie. I'm curious.
- 03:51
Wise Man #3
Yo, man, he making noises. I'm not holding him no more. Y'all got to do that.
- 03:54
Wise Man #3
Yeah, we out of here, man. We out of here.
- 03:56
Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo, yo.
- 03:58
Kenan Thompson
Hey, boys, don't drop that blanket. Oh, and there it is.
- 04:08
Leslie Jones
Good for you, Lama!
- 04:14
Host
Okie-dokie! That concludes our nativity program. There's more, but you guys know the story, right? Thank you, and I am so sorry.
- 04:23
Terri
And we'll be sticking around after the service if anybody would like a picture with the llama.
- 04:28
Kenan Thompson
Oh, I'm-a be there.
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
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