Zombie Press Conference

Interrupting regular programming with an emergency broadcast, an Army spokesman at the Pentagon podium announces that the infected will soon turn back into humans, then sheepishly apologizes for having told the nation to shoot zombies in the face the day before. To make up for it, he declares that nobody will be prosecuted for any violence over the next two weeks, then scrambles to clarify that the amnesty covers mistaken zombie killings rather than old grudges at the local skate park. Back in the Defense Department war room, he and his fellow officers celebrate that their overpopulation scheme is working, joke about fluoride and chemicals sprayed from planes, and rush off to the skate park themselves.