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Simpsons Christmas Gift
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.
The setup
Watch on YouTube
Watch onYouTube
The premise
Here’s the bit.
At an office Secret Santa exchange, a man opens a framed picture of himself drawn as a Simpsons character, made by his coworker Trevor with an app, and is overjoyed. While the others open their gifts, he keeps steering the conversation back to the life he would lead in Springfield, rejecting colleagues' suggestions that do not center on him. His imagined episode grows darker and more self-flattering: he becomes a dance teacher at Bart's school who learns Homer is abusing Marge, tracks Homer down at Moe's, and kills him with a spinning kick, after which Marge and Bart embrace him as their hero, all shown in Simpsons-style animation. Some coworkers are disturbed while others eagerly add to the plot, and he wraps up the pitch with a cheerful merry Christmas.
The funny people
Meet the cast. 7
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
You made me into a Simpsons character? So I'm, like, in the show now?
In my episode, he does.
That's good, but not for my episode.
A little extra
Notes from the archive.
Chloe Fineman voices Marge Simpson in the sketch's animated fantasy sequence.
Script
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.
- 00:01
Sarah Sherman
Okay, my Secret Santa got me... Oh, marijuana nipple pasties.
- 00:09
Emil Wakim
I thought they were Earth Day stickers.
- 00:12
Sarah Sherman
Totally. Thank you.
- 00:13
Chris Rock
All right, my turn. Let's see what my Secret Santa has delivered. Okay, what am I looking at?
- 00:24
Trevor
Well, not to out myself as your Secret Santa, but I made you into a Simpsons character.
- 00:30
Chris Rock
You made me into a Simpsons character? So I'm, like, in the show now?
- 00:36
Trevor
Well, no, I just made it using an app called Simpsify. You send in a photo, and they make it look like you're in The Simpsons.
- 00:44
Chris Rock
I've been Simpsified? That's hilarious! Thank you, Trevor. This is the best gift I've ever gotten in my life. Seriously.
- 00:53
Susan Wheels
Okay. Guess I'll go next. Let's see what my secret Santa got me. Oh, a jump rope.
- 01:01
Andrew Dismukes
I panicked that
- 01:05
Susan Wheels
No, um, I like it, I'm just not totally sure I can use it for another seven months
- 01:12
Andrew Dismukes
again I'm really sorry
- 01:15
Chris Rock
question what would my job be in Springfield
- 01:20
Carol
yeah maybe you're the medical director at a teaching hospital like you You are in real life.
- 01:29
Chris Rock
Wrong. Wheels?
- 01:32
Susan Wheels
My name is Susan.
- 01:34
Trevor
In his defense, your name is Susan Wheels.
- 01:38
Susan Wheels
Yeah, I just don't think he meant it that way, but maybe you work with Mr. Burns.
- 01:44
Chris Rock
No. I'm a dance teacher at Bart's school, and Bart likes me because I see something in him.
- 01:54
Trevor
cool man yeah that seems fine i'm glad you're enjoying the gift
- 01:59
Carol
okay can i do a gift now i haven't opened mine yet
- 02:02
come on
- 02:06
Carol
oh my god i've been meaning to try these now i won't have to keep buying new pants
- 02:13
Chris Rock
i'll tell you who i'd like to avoid in springfield homer homer's not a good guy
- 02:22
Andrew Dismukes
oh really i don't know i think he's kind of funny
- 02:25
Chris Rock
so it's funny to drink all day and and strangle your son and hit your wife.
- 02:30
Trevor
I don't think Homer hits Marge.
- 02:34
Chris Rock
In my episode, he does.
- 02:37
Andrew Dismukes
In your episode of The Simpsons, Homer hits Marge?
- 02:41
Chris Rock
Well, that's part of it. I mean, what else happens around? Come on. Let's go around. What else happens in my episode?
- 02:47
Emil Wakim
Maybe Milhouse gets a cool haircut and Bart gets jealous?
- 02:53
Chris Rock
That's good, but not for my episode. but save it for something else here's what i think happens here's what i think happens bart goes to my dance class but he's got tears in his eyes something's wrong at home so i go see marge and i can tell somebody kicked her ass
- 03:18
Andrew Dismukes
you gotta tell chief wiggum
- 03:20
Chris Rock
chief wiggum is too stupid and fat no i take matters into my own hands so i go looking for homer
- 03:30
oh he's probably at moe's
- 03:33
Chris Rock
he is he's been drinking all night
- 03:37
Susan Wheels
probably with his buddy barney
- 03:39
Chris Rock
yes wills you're on a roll
- 03:42
Susan Wheels
i don't love that
- 03:48
Chris Rock
So... so so I walk over to Homer and I say what kind of man hits a woman and Homer takes a swing at me but I spin and kick him in the chest and as he lied dying on the floor he utters his final words
- 04:10
Trevor
and then Marge comes running in she jumps into your arms and she says
- 04:17
Chloe Fineman
my hero you killed homie
- 04:22
Emil Wakim
and Bart's there too he hugs you and says thanks dad
- 04:28
Chris Rock
cut to night time me and Marge are in bed she says
- 04:34
Chloe Fineman
ready to go to round six
- 04:36
Chris Rock
And I say, I got the stamina
- 04:40
Because you're a dancer
- 04:43
Chris Rock
It all comes together Just like me and Ma Merry Christmas, everyone!
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
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