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Jewish Elvis
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.
The setup
Watch on YouTube
Watch onYouTube
The premise
Here’s the bit.
A granddaughter visiting The Oasis retirement home discovers that its Hanukkah entertainment is the residents’ beloved Jewish Elvis. The singer interrupts familiar melodies with complaints and Yiddish-inflected jokes, while Lois and her friends respond like delirious teenage fans. The granddaughter struggles to understand the appeal as Lois throws her underwear onto the stage and reveals merchandise bearing the performer’s catchphrase. The home’s director interrupts with a report of a flooded toilet that implicates the star. Lois then joins her idol onstage, and the performance becomes an ensemble bathroom song, complete with a toilet and giant soda cans.
The funny people
Meet the cast. 6
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
It's a little bit of singing, but it's mostly complaining.
Yeah, he's Jewish Elvis. Hello! Are you stupid?
Behind the scenes
The people who made it.
Dan Bulla
Writer
Sarah Sherman
Writer
A little extra
Notes from the archive.
Sarah Sherman said an earlier version was cut at dress rehearsal before the sketch reached air during Austin Butler’s December 2022 episode.
Script
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.
- 00:03
Grandmother
Okay. Okay, these are very good seats, ladies. I mean, very good seats.
- 00:10
Grandchild
Wow, Grandma, I didn't realize your retirement home had its very own theater. I mean, this is fantastic.
- 00:14
Grandmother
Oh, no, the Oasis has it all. A nightclub. A sauna. Carpeted bathrooms. Carpeted locker rooms. And a steakhouse where everything is well done. Except the service.
- 00:25
Grandchild
Um, Grandma, what's wrong with Lois?
- 00:27
Lois
Oh, my God, he's here. He's in the building. Oh, my friggin' God. It's really happening.
- 00:36
Grandmother
She's just excited for the show.
- 00:37
Laura
Yeah, Lauren, we all. I mean, first night of Hanukkah, and they really kicked things off with a bang.
- 00:42
Grandchild
I don't understand. Who are you all so excited to see?
- 00:44
Lois
Oh, oh, there he is. There he is. Oh, my God. It's Jewish Elvis!
- 00:51
Speaker 1
Aah! Oh, my God!
- 01:08
Jewish Elvis
Thank you! Thank you very much! Can somebody turn up the AC? You I'm Pitching like a friggin' hound dog up here. What are you gonna do? It's Viva Las Vegas.
- 01:25
Lois
Oh, my God. Oh, my God, I'm so horny, I'm gonna friggin' explode.
- 01:30
Grandchild
Explode? I'm sorry, I don't get it.
- 01:32
Grandmother
Oh, I can explain. He's Jewish Elvis.
- 01:36
Grandchild
Right. But...
- 01:38
Lois
Quiet. He's about to sing. Quiet. He's about to sing.
- 01:42
Jewish Elvis
Wise men say, who are these wise men? Why are they so wise? Only fools rush in. What's the rush? Everybody just relax. I can't help. I could help. I don't want to. I'm tired. I can't help ordering a Diet Coke at every restaurant I go to.
- 02:09
Lois
You're a friggin' angel. Oh, my God.
- 02:15
Grandchild
It's a little bit of singing, but it's mostly complaining.
- 02:20
Grandmother
Yeah, he's Jewish Elvis. Hello. Are you stupid?
- 02:24
Lois
It's I'm like Niagara Falls all about him. He can drown. Oh! Oh! Ruin me, Jewish Elvis! Ruin me!
- 02:44
everything
- 02:45
Jewish Elvis
oh no thank you i think everything bagels got a little too much cream cheese on it you know what i'm saying
- 02:56
Laura
This is the best night of my life.
- 02:59
Grandchild
Night? It is 4.30 in the afternoon.
- 03:03
Jewish Elvis
Oh, my God, I got schmutz all over my suit. Was no one gonna tell me? I got schmutz all over my freaking suit i mean what a this? What is this, mustard? I'm walking around like a goofball with mustard all over my friggin' little scarf. I mean, oh, my God! This is a z-z-zaster!
- 03:22
Grandchild
Did he just say disaster
- 03:23
Lois
it's it's his famous catchphrase hello
- 03:30
Burt
All right, sorry everyone i'm bert the director of the retirement home
- 03:35
Lois
get your fat ASS OFF THE STAGE! YOU ARE A BLOCKING jewish elvis you fat a-hole
- 03:43
Burt
ladies calm down Apparently, somebody broke the toilet in the handicapped stall. It's completely flooded and covered in blue rhinestones. When this is said, there was a man inside screaming, oh, no, it won't go down. This is a z-z-z-z-zaster. Jewish Elvis, is there anything you want to say?
- 04:05
Jewish Elvis
Yeah. Hey, what are you gonna know? It's Viva Las Vegas!
- 04:09
Grandmother
Get off the stage, fatso!
- 04:12
Grandchild
Wait, guys, where's Lois?
- 04:14
Grandmother
I don't know.
- 04:14
Laura
Oh my god, she's doing cake!
- 04:17
Oh, egg
- 04:18
Jewish Elvis
Ow! Ow! Sing it with me, Connie! My stomach hurts! Sing it with me!
- 04:27
Jewish Elvis
I've got a bad cramp! I love you, together! I think I accidentally had Gary! on together, y'all!
- 04:37
Speaker 1
We can't go on Together! This cheese We delicious all got diarrhea from delicious cheese! -♪
- 04:52
Jewish Elvis
Happy Squirrel Hanukkah, everyone! From all of us at Chewy County!
- 04:58
Speaker 1
-♪ Happy Squirrel Hanukkah! -♪ Happy Squirrel Hanukkah!
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
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