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Gump Fiction
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.
The setup
Watch on YouTube
Watch onYouTube
The premise
Here’s the bit.
Framed as a summer movie trailer, the parody recasts Forrest Gump as a suited gunman alongside a Jules-style partner. After a bench-side chocolate offer goes badly, Forrest escorts the boss's wife, sits through a fast-food riff that keeps turning into shrimp, and turns up in the Texas School Book Depository window beside Lee Harvey Oswald. The trailer races through a pawnshop basement where Lieutenant Dan is held captive, a surprise ambush and title cards before Forrest closes on the bench with a violent new twist on his box-of-chocolates philosophy.
The funny people
Meet the cast. 5
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
Look, I'm diabetic, all right? I don't want any of your damn chocolates.
You know what they call shrimp in France?
I was aiming for Jackie.
A little extra
Notes from the archive.
The trailer re-aired in season 1, episode 8 (December 9, 1995). Phil LaMarr, who appears as himself, played Marvin in Pulp Fiction (1994).
Script
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.
- 00:00
Speaker 1
This summer 20th Century Fox is proud to present the most reassuring film of the decade What is sure to become the feel-good motion picture event of a lifetime?
- 00:11
Forrest Gump
Hello My name is Forrest Forrest Gump. Do you want a chocolate? I could eat about a million of these How about you? Excuse me. I asked you a question.
- 00:31
Samuel L. Jackson
Look I'm diabetic, right? I don't want any of your damn chocolates. What are you stupid or something?
- 00:38
Forrest Gump
Mom always says, stupid is as stupid does.
- 00:41
Speaker 1
A fiction the film critics are calling violently heartwarming.
- 00:52
Speaker 2
I do believe my husband, your boss, told you to take me out and do whatever I wanted.
- 01:00
Forrest Gump
Okay. Okay. You know what they call shrimp in France?
- 01:05
Samuel L. Jackson
Quarter pounder with Chase?
- 01:07
Forrest Gump
No.
- 01:08
Samuel L. Jackson
A Royale with Chase?
- 01:09
Forrest Gump
No.
- 01:10
Samuel L. Jackson
Quarter pounder Royale with Chase?
- 01:12
Forrest Gump
No.
- 01:14
Samuel L. Jackson
Filet-O-Shrimp Royale?
- 01:16
Forrest Gump
No.
- 01:18
Samuel L. Jackson
Shrimp McNugget Royale?
- 01:20
Forrest Gump
No.
- 01:22
Samuel L. Jackson
Hamburger Royale with shrimp?
- 01:24
Forrest Gump
No.
- 01:30
Speaker 3
How many guys we got, Forrest?
- 01:34
Forrest Gump
Two up on that grassy hill and one up here in this building.
- 01:38
Speaker 3
Come on, Forrest. Let's get in the character.
- 01:42
Speaker 1
A rich palette of contemporary American morphing, as well as a lot of presidents getting shot.
- 01:54
Oh, I was aiming for Jackie.
- 01:57
Speaker 3
Run, Forrest, run!
- 02:01
Speaker 4
You're soon gonna be a woman...
- 02:05
Forrest Gump
Sodomy is as sodomy does.
- 02:10
Oh!
- 02:12
Speaker 3
Gump meet gimp. gimp gump
- 02:16
Lieutenant Dan
i am not a gimp at least i would tree if you'd let me die
- 02:26
Forrest Gump
lieutenant diane lieutenant diane is made for us
- 02:29
Speaker 1
tom hanks samuel l jackson
- 02:33
Samuel L. Jackson
double shrimp cheese pizza with cheese
- 02:34
Speaker 1
uma thurman john f kennedy lee harvey oswald gary sinise and phil lamar
- 02:41
Not again!
- 02:43
Speaker 3
Die, you sweetly retar-
- 02:51
Forrest Gump
Now maybe it's just me, but I believe we're gonna have to get medieval on your buttocks.
- 03:00
Speaker 1
This summer, you won't know the Gump until you see the fiction.
- 03:04
Forrest Gump
Life is like a box of chocolates. You open it up, and most times someone has taken a bite out of each and every one. That's when I gotta get out my .45 and blow their heads off. That's all I have to say about that.
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
More from across the archive.
