Joe Has Syphilis

Pacing his apartment, Joe works up the nerve to call Sheila, an ex he has not spoken to in a long time. Once she picks up, he explains that he has just come back from the doctor with a syphilis diagnosis and stresses that she is the only person he has slept with. Sheila, assuming she must have infected him, collapses into apologies while Joe graciously says it is fine and quickly wraps up the call. The moment he hangs up he celebrates, then scrolls his contacts and dials Karen to deliver the same speech, revealing that the diagnosis is an invention he is feeding to one ex after another.

Aired in the fifth and final season of The Whitest Kids U'Know on IFC; the same episode also features the Homeless Show and Cactus Wasp sketches.