You're tuned to the good stuff
Bedroom
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.
The setup
Watch on YouTube
Watch onYouTube
The premise
Here’s the bit.
A man asks his girlfriend to add some playful banter to their evening in bed. She responds with blunt personal observations and takes his role-play suggestions in directions that spoil the mood. His increasingly specific instructions lead from classroom scenarios to an Australian surfer persona, but her celebrity impressions turn even that simple plan into another bewildering conversation.
The funny people
Meet the cast. 2
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
Keep it legal.
Let’s keep it simple and fun.
Behind the scenes
The people who made it.
Mikey Day
Writer
Streeter Seidell
Writer
Script
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.
- 00:01
Guy / Liam
Hey, baby, you're looking good
- 00:04
what
- 00:05
Dirty Talk Girl / Owen Wilson / Wanda Sykes
oh, yeah, it's Sunday night. That's when we have sex
- 00:10
Guy / Liam
You know don't say it like that like it's like a hair appointment or something.
- 00:14
Dirty Talk Girl / Owen Wilson / Wanda Sykes
No, I'm pumped for it. I promise. Let's start
- 00:17
Guy / Liam
I was thinking maybe we could do something a little fun tonight try spice things up a bit We think my little dirty talk.
- 00:29
Dirty Talk Girl / Owen Wilson / Wanda Sykes
Oh, yeah, that's hot
- 00:33
Guy / Liam
What's up, you dirty girl?
- 00:34
Dirty Talk Girl / Owen Wilson / Wanda Sykes
Yeah. What's up, you freakin' alcoholic?
- 00:38
Guy / Liam
Oh, man. Well, you know, babe, let's not bring up my old demons, you know? I mean, I'm a little sensitive about that. How about this? Just be, like, a little mean to me.
- 00:53
Dirty Talk Girl / Owen Wilson / Wanda Sykes
Okay. What's up, bitch? I make more money than you.
- 00:58
Guy / Liam
Okay, well, that's kind of another sore spot for me, boo. You know, I... Let's keep it simple. How about you just call me Daddy?
- 01:08
Dirty Talk Girl / Owen Wilson / Wanda Sykes
Okay.
- 01:08
Okay. Mmm.
- 01:11
Guy / Liam
You like that?
- 01:12
Dirty Talk Girl / Owen Wilson / Wanda Sykes
Oh, yeah, Dad. Do me, Dad!
- 01:16
Guy / Liam
Okay. One second. I... Maybe don't say Dad, because Dad, it just... It just sounds like you're talking about your real dad. You know, like your biological dad. Maybe, um... Maybe you just need a little structure, you know? I'm a little role-playing, huh?
- 01:34
Mmm.
- 01:35
Guy / Liam
Here, I'll lead us off. Well, hello, young lady. Are you here after class for some extra tutoring?
- 01:44
Dirty Talk Girl / Owen Wilson / Wanda Sykes
Oh, yeah, I am. Because I have a learning disability. And I read the words go out of order.
- 01:51
Guy / Liam
Okay, baby, the thing is, that's just kind of sad. Okay, how about, um, how about, uh, you know why you're here in the principal's office, young lady?
- 02:08
Dirty Talk Girl / Owen Wilson / Wanda Sykes
Because I brought a gun to school.
- 02:10
Guy / Liam
Okay, I... No, you don't have a gun, babe. I think... I... I think you're here because you've been dressing like a slut. Now, give me one reason I shouldn't kick you out of school.
- 02:22
Dirty Talk Girl / Owen Wilson / Wanda Sykes
Because I want to do you.
- 02:24
Guy / Liam
Ooh, you are bad.
- 02:26
Dirty Talk Girl / Owen Wilson / Wanda Sykes
Yeah, I'm the baddest girl in sixth grade.
- 02:29
Guy / Liam
No, no, no, no, no. You can't... You can't be in the sixth grade. Because... General rule, all right? Dirty talk, you're 18, all right? Keep it legal.
- 02:49
Dirty Talk Girl / Owen Wilson / Wanda Sykes
Oh, okay.
- 02:50
Guy / Liam
Okay.
- 02:52
Dirty Talk Girl / Owen Wilson / Wanda Sykes
But I read at a sixth-grade level because of my learning disability.
- 02:55
Guy / Liam
No, let's... Let's move on from that, okay? Let's... Let's keep it simple and fun, all right? Let's start with a voice, okay? I'm Liam. I'm a surfer from Australia. You want to see my didgeridoo?
- 03:14
Dirty Talk Girl / Owen Wilson / Wanda Sykes
Oh, yeah. Show it to me. Wow.
- 03:17
Guy / Liam
Oh, yeah? What's your name?
- 03:19
Dirty Talk Girl / Owen Wilson / Wanda Sykes
-"Owen Wilson, baby."
- 03:22
I'm not Owen Wilson. I'm not Owen Wilson. Not Owen Wilson. You're not. I'm not. You're not Owen Wilson.
- 03:32
Guy / Liam
I mean, no disrespect. I mean, Shanghai nights all day, but... You got to do a lady's voice, too.
- 03:38
Dirty Talk Girl / Owen Wilson / Wanda Sykes
-"Um, Wanda Sykes." -"You want to get nasty with Wanda Sykes, baby? Yeah."
- 03:46
Guy / Liam
Isn't she a lesbian?
- 03:48
Dirty Talk Girl / Owen Wilson / Wanda Sykes
-"Oh, yeah."
- 03:49
Guy / Liam
Nah. It's kinda hot.
- 03:52
Oh, yeah.
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
More from across the archive.
