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Senator Clint Webb

The Whitest Kids U'Know2010Season 4Episode 2
The Whitest Kids U'KnowWKUK
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.

The setup

Senate hopeful Clint Webb's slick campaign ad is remarkably candid about how hollow and self-serving his whole image is.

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Community rating

– / 10

The premise

Here’s the bit.

Clint Webb introduces himself in a glossy Senate campaign spot, posing in a park beside his smiling wife and a newborn he has dressed in a tiny business suit. Strolling down courthouse steps and sitting in a flag-draped office, he calmly explains that he has lived a deliberately bland life since childhood to prepare for office, that his sense of entitlement borders on the sociopathic, and that he moved to the state he professes to love only a year and a half ago. The ad then ticks through every political cliché out loud, from an unflattering photo and an out-of-context quote of his opponent to the family dog and a token stint in the military, before Webb reveals that the message voters should send Washington is simply himself.

The funny people

Meet the cast. 2

Say it with us

Highly quotable.

I possess a sort of sociopathic narcissism that makes me think that I should be in charge of everyone.

I don't make friends. I make acquaintances.

So this November, let's send Washington a message. And what is that message? Hey... me.

A little extra

Notes from the archive.

Aired in the second episode of the fourth season on IFC (June 18, 2010), an episode directed by troupe members Zach Cregger and Trevor Moore.

ScriptEnglish · 9 turns

Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.

  1. 00:00

    Clint Webb

    Hi, I'm Clint Webb, and I'm running for Senate. I have a short, cropped haircut, a pretty enough yet accessible-looking wife, and a newborn baby that I've dressed in a suit to prove to you that I mean business.

  2. 00:12

    Clint Webb

    For the last 15 years, I've lived my life in such a bland, uncontroversial, and repressed manner that it's almost unnatural. Why? Because I've been preparing to be a representative since I was a child.

  3. 00:25

    Clint Webb

    Most well-adjusted, sane men would be hesitant to take a job where their decisions would so drastically affect the lives of so many, but not me.

  4. 00:34

    Clint Webb

    I possess a sort of sociopathic narcissism that makes me think that I should be in charge of everyone. But all of that needs to start here at home, in this beautiful state that I've grown to love since I moved here 18 months ago.

  5. 00:48

    Clint Webb

    Together, we can piggyback some of our state's legitimate needs onto my unquenchable lust for self-glorification, and that's a promise.

  6. 00:57

    Clint Webb

    Here's an unflattering picture of my opponent. Here's a quote of his taken out of context.

  7. 01:03

    Clint Webb

    Oh, and one more thing. I have a dog. I enlisted in the military for the minimum amount of time in a position that would never see combat. Why? Well, because it would help me be your senator.

  8. 01:18

    Clint Webb

    I don't make friends. I make acquaintances. All of my motives are ulterior. I'm self-involved to the point of psychosis. My soul is terrifying. And that's leadership.

  9. 01:29

    Clint Webb

    So this November, let's send Washington a message. And what is that message? Hey. Me.

The rabbit hole continues

One more couldn’t hurt.

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