Ben Marshall
Guy
You're tuned to the good stuff
The setup
The premise
An upbeat announcer pitches Uber Eats Wrapped, a year-end recap of your delivery habits modeled on Spotify Wrapped. A series of embarrassed customers are walked through the app’s findings: a fast-food restaurant lineup that explains why the plumber keeps coming by, a top-one-percent nugget ranking, an Uber Eats age that comes out as dead or as fat, a montage of the outfits worn to meet drivers and a $24,000 yearly total that sends one man scrambling. A Wendy’s employee then thanks a customer on screen for making his store number one in the country, and the pitch ends when a phone flung from a speeding car hits a pedestrian with the news, leaving the shocked man to ask whether the sender has lost their mind.
The funny people
Guy
David
Girl
Melissa
Guy (voice)
Girl
Say it with us
Says I'm in the top 1% of nuggets. What does that even mean?
My top food was churros, and my Uber Eats age is dead?
Because of you, we are the number-one Wendy's in the country.
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.
Announcer (voice)
It's the end of the year and you know what that means.
Girl
Honey, Spotify Wrapped just dropped.
Guy
Oh my God, I love when they do this.
Announcer (voice)
It's a way of looking back at who you were in 2025.
David
Steely Dan? Yeah, that tracks.
Announcer (voice)
With shareable stats showing how you compared to people around the world.
Girl
I'm in Sabrina Carpenter's top 1%? That's so neat.
Announcer (voice)
Well, now there's another way to look back at who you truly were this year. Introducing Uber Eats Wrapped.
David
Oh no. No, thank you.
Announcer (voice)
We studied your patterns and crunched the numbers.
David
Oh, no, I understood what it was. I just don't like that, and I don't want that.
Announcer (voice)
Well, we did it anyway. Now you can find out which restaurants you couldn't live without.
Girl
Taco Bell, Five Guys, Burger King, Chipotle.
Guy
Guess that explains why the plumber's always here.
Guy
He's not always here.
Plumber
Toilet's all clear, killer.
Guy
Oh, thanks, man.
Plumber
You know I got you, bro. No problem.
Announcer (voice)
And learn what food items had you in a chokehold.
David
Says I'm in the top 1% of nuggets. What does that even mean?
Girl
Take a wild guess, David.
David
What? That I eat more nuggets than 99% of the world? That can't be true.
Girl
You're eating nuggets right now.
Announcer (voice)
And based on your order history, our math wizards have determined your Uber Eats age.
Girl
My top food was churros, and my Uber Eats age is dead?
Guy
Better than mine. 52 and fat. I don't know how they got that fat.
Girl
I do. Hoo-hoo!
Guy
What woman in the world would like what you just did?
Announcer (voice)
And we weren't the only ones serving this year. Check out all the looks you wore to greet your Uber drivers.
Melissa
Who would I even share these with?
Announcer (voice)
And we calculated exactly how much money you spent on Uber Eats this year.
David
$24,000. Just give me one second.
Announcer (voice)
And check out personalized messages from the restaurants that kept you fed.
Wendy’s Employee
Thank you so much, Melissa. Because of you, we are the number one Wendy's in the country.
Guy
Oh, my God! A phone just hit me!
Girl
It's Uber Eats Wrapped.
Guy
You have to tell people you're going to do this.
Guy
Are you out of your mind?
The rabbit hole continues
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