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Joanne & The Tree

Saturday Night Live 2016 Season 42 Episode 9

SKETCH-O-VISION

A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.

The setup

When an accountant tumbles out of a skyscraper window clutching the office Christmas tree, her coworkers debate how to rescue it, and how much to bother with her.

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Community rating

– / 10

The premise

Here’s the bit.

At the office holiday party, boss Mr. Jenkins hands Joanne from accounting the angel to put on top of the tree, and the team cheers her on until she topples out the window. Looking down, they find her clinging to the ledge with the tree in her arms, and every rescue plan puts the tree ahead of the person: bring the tree in first, swing it around for momentum, or chug an energy drink and heave it up. Mr. Jenkins can't pull her up because of an old workplace complaint about grabbing wrists, so he offers her a pair of gloves from the gift swap instead, and a coworker swaps them for a kettlebell. Joanne drops, and the group sorts out who will clean up, until Santa shows up to save only the tree.

The funny people

Meet the cast. 5

John CenaHost

Mr. Jenkins

Highly quotable.

Or could I suggest that we bring in my human body first?

Don't drop that tree, you friggin' Grinch!

I got in a lot of trouble around here for grabbing women's wrists.

ScriptEnglish · 39 turns

Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.

00:00
Mr. Jenkins
Okie-dokie, gang. We'll start the Yankee Swap in a second. But first, I want to thank Kara for getting us such a great tree this year. So all we need is a volunteer to put this crazy little angel on top of that tree.
00:12
Joanne
Oh, I'll do it, Mr. Jenkins.
00:15
Mr. Jenkins
Joanne from accountant stepping up. Nice initiative. Here you go. Get her done.
00:23
Joanne
Oh, sorry, I'm a little excited.
00:25
Felicia
Go, Joanne! Joanne! Joanne! Joanne! Joanne!
00:31
Karen
A little higher, Joanne!
00:34
Mr. Jenkins
Did Joanne just fall off the freakin' window?
00:38
Karen
Oh, my God!
00:40
Mr. Jenkins
We don't even have the tree anymore.
00:43
Felicia
Christmas is ruined!
00:46
Karen
There she is!
00:47
Felicia
Oh, stupid Joanne! This is what you get for tryin' to step into the spotlight.
00:54
Joanne
Guys! Co-workers! I'm sorry I'm not dead. I'm sorry for the drama earlier, but I'm out here!
01:04
Karen
Oh, my God! Joanne! And she's got the tree
01:07
Mr. Jenkins
Everything's gonna be okay.
01:08
Felicia
Hey, you saved the tree, girl.
01:10
Mr. Jenkins
Two for two on the initiative, Joanne.
01:13
Joanne
Okay, well, I think I'm losing my grip. I think I need to drop the tree.
01:17
Mr. Jenkins
Don't do that, Joanne. Without the tree, there's no party. We can save you both. I know it.
01:22
Karen
All right, let's bring the tree in first, so we know we have it. Okay?
01:26
Joanne
Or could I suggest that we bring in my human body first?
01:32
Mr. Jenkins
Joanne, stop trying to control everything.
01:34
Felicia
All right, look, look, I have an idea. Joanne, start whipping that tree around, okay? Get a nice windmill action going, then use that momentum to fly upwards through the window.
01:44
Joanne
Okay, I don't think I can do that. This tree has got to go.
01:48
Coworker
Don't drop that tree, you frickin' Grinch!
01:52
Coworker
Okay, uh, new plan. I'm gonna pour this monster energy drink in your mouth. You're gonna go all Popeye on us, and throw that tree up to us like it's nothing.
02:02
Joanne
Please don't do that.
02:04
Karen
It's working! It's working! It's working!
02:06
Joanne
No, it's not working. It's really only in my eyes. Please, Mr. Jenkins, just pull me up. You're the strongest man I've ever seen. I can see your muscles through your business shirt like every damn day. Just grab my wrist.
02:23
Mr. Jenkins
Love to, Joanne, but I can't. I got in a lot of trouble around here for grabbing women's wrists. Uh, but I do want to give you something. It's a pair of women's isotoners. I got your name in the Yankee Swap.
02:34
Joanne
Oh. Oh. Thank you, Mr. Jenkins. They're really nice.
02:39
Coworker
Okay, but here's where Yankee Swap gets interesting. I'm gonna steal the women's gloves, and I'm gonna give you the 30-pound kettlebell that Felicia gave me.
02:49
Joanne
Oh. Oh. Oh, no.
02:54
Karen
Well, we tried. Poor Joanne.
02:57
Mr. Jenkins
Poor tree as well. Alright, somebody's gonna have to scoop her off the sidewalk when the party's done.
03:01
Coworker
I'll do it. Just remind me.
03:04
Joanne
Ah, ah, ah, aah!
03:08
Speaker 1
Ho, ho, ho! Joanne, it's me!
03:12
Joanne
Santa, you're here to save me! No? S-Santa, no!