New Cast Member or Arcade Fire?

Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.

1. 00:01

   Speaker 1

   It's time for America's favorite game show, New Cast!

2. 00:10
   

   Game Show Host

   Yes. Hello and welcome to New Cast Member or Arcade Fire. The game is simple. Contestants must attempt to tell the difference between a member of Arcade Fire and one of SNL's new featured players. Let's meet tonight's celebrity guest. She made you laugh on 30 Rock, and she can be a real bossy pants, Miss Tina Fey. Oh, it's great to have you, Tina. Now, you've been working with some of the new folks this week.

3. 00:44
   

   Contestant

   Yeah.

4. 00:44
   

   Game Show Host

   Do you feel good about your chances?

5. 00:46
   

   Contestant

   No, I do not think that I will do well.

6. 00:48
   

   Game Show Host

   Well, let's begin. Tina, here's the first match-up.

7. 00:52
   

   Contestant

   Okay.

8. 00:57
   

   Game Show Host

   Okay, Tina, which one is the new cast member, and which one's in Arcade Fire?

9. 01:03
   

   Contestant

   Okay, let's see. Uh, guy on the left looks comfortable on stage. Kind of hip clothes, looks a little alternative. But the guy in the glasses has a real deer in the headlights look. He's already sweated through his ironic Boston legal T-shirt. I feel pretty good about this. The guy in the glasses is the new cast member.

10. 01:24
    

    Game Show Host

    You are correct. That is right. This is the new SNL cast member.

11. 01:30
    

    Kyle Mooney

    Hey, Tina. Or should I say, salutations?

12. 01:33
    

    Game Show Host

    No! Do not do that. No silly voices. My hip, that is not good. Get your ass out of here. So sorry, Tina. That was not supposed to happen.

13. 01:52
    

    Contestant

    No, no, he seems like he's gonna be great.

14. 01:57
    

    Game Show Host

    Here's your next challenge.

15. 01:59
    

    Contestant

    Okay,

16. 02:04
    

    Game Show Host

    new cast member or Arcade Fire.

17. 02:08
    

    Contestant

    Huh. Okay, this is getting a little tougher. Couple of Major League Pixies. Wow. Talk about a Sophie's Choice. Okay. Trying to picture either of them in Arcade Fire. Can I see what they would look like holding old-timey instruments?

18. 02:22
    

    Game Show Host

    Oh, absolutely. Can we bring in the old-timey instruments?

19. 02:29
    

    Contestant

    Wow. Those look massively stupid. Um... I don't know. The one in the polka dots is in Arcade Fire.

20. 02:37
    

    Game Show Host

    Oh, I'm sorry. That is incorrect. That is actually a new cast member.

21. 02:42
    

    Noel Wells

    Tina, it's such an honor to meet you. I mean, the whole reason I got into comedy was...

22. 02:45
    

    Game Show Host

    Hey! No way!

23. 02:47

    I'm very sorry.

24. 03:04
    

    Contestant

    No, that's okay. I remember back when I was a new cast member...

25. 03:07
    

    Game Show Host

    Shh, Tina. This isn't an interview. Thanks. Here comes round three.

26. 03:12
    

    Game Show Host

    Hey, Tina, take it away.

27. 03:21
    

    Contestant

    Oof. Okay. This guy in the tie is coming in real hot. Seems way too happy with himself. And, uh, God, on the left, we got some kind of hipster Paul Bunyan. He could be a Civil War reenactor or, like, a Serbian basketball player. I... Now, I can't tell who's on SNL. Can I see them do an impression?

28. 03:45
    

    Game Show Host

    Gentlemen, your finest dinero. Nero.

29. 03:47

    Robert De Niro impression

    Sure. Are you talking to me?

30. 03:51

    Robert De Niro impression

    Are you talking to me?

31. 03:56

    Robert De Niro impression

    I'm watching you, Parker. I'm watching you.

32. 03:59
    

    Contestant

    That does not help at all. Can I phone a friend?

33. 04:09
    

    Game Show Host

    We'll do you one better. Send in the lifeline. Ah, Lorne Michaels. You think you can help Tina out and tell us which one is the the new cast member

34. 04:26

    Speaker 1

    10 seconds remember as producer of saturday night live lauren himself recently hired one of these people to be in the cast the other one is a musician who's performed on snl four times in the last six years now lauren must decide which is the new cast member

35. 04:46
    

    Lorne Michaels

    is it the black one

36. 04:50

    humbling

37. 05:07
    

    Game Show Host

    round thinks i'm a new cast member dudes know me half my life He called me the black one, didn't he?

38. 05:18
    

    Game Show Host

    Well, the show is over.

39. 05:20
    

    Contestant

    Oh, do I win anything?

40. 05:22
    

    Game Show Host

    Don't you have enough? See you next week, I guess.