Weekend Update: Girl You Wish You Hadn't Started a Conversation with on Christmas

At a holiday party, Seth Meyers brings on the guest nobody wishes they had started talking to, and she wastes no time declaring herself disgusted by how commercial Christmas has become. She lectures him about the true meaning of the holiday, accuses him of worshipping a greeting-card channel, and stacks up confident but nonsensical facts about hunger, gender ratios and what the founders must have intended, while Seth struggles to follow her logic. She scolds him for wanting a new gadget, drags him toward her friend's origami project, then announces a final list of words for him to live by and closes his eyes for a theatrical reveal that welcomes him to America.