In a mock late-night infomercial, grinning billiards champion Van Hammersly introduces his Teaching by Billiards video series from a wood-paneled parlor. The first tape, "I Oughta Be in Pictures," turns the balls into stars of old Hollywood, which he narrates with a showman's patter while knocking them around the table. Volume 2, "Off to the Races," restages the 1974 Kentucky Derby with cue sticks laid out as a track and racehorses with ever stranger names, and another tape covers a historic bus disaster the same way. The pitch climbs to Volume 4, "Your G.E.D.," which claims to cover mathematics, science, American history, belly dancing and much more, as Van flails across the felt, sprawls on the table and finally throws his arms wide in triumph under a gold seal of approval.
