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Bungee
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.
The setup
Watch on YouTube
Watch onYouTube
The premise
Here’s the bit.
A woman brings her boyfriend Joe to a bungee workout class taught by Nathaniel Latrine, a flamboyant self-declared bungee queen who is thrilled to see a man in the room. Joe doubts that bouncing on cords counts as exercise, and the calorie meter backs him up: the whole class has burned just five calories between them. Nathaniel's warm-ups grow stranger by the minute, and he snaps at anyone who questions him, while the class insists the workout is brutal. When a birthday cake arrives, Nathaniel has everyone fly across the room to take bites, and the session collapses in a heap of cake, with the meter going deeply negative.
The funny people
Meet the cast. 7
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
Okay, this is your captain speaking. We are landing ahead of schedule at your destination, your dream body.
Y'all already know, I'm Nathaniel Latrine, the bungee queen.
Script
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.
- 00:01
Joe
Babe, babe, this is what you do to work out? Whatever happened to just running on the treadmill?
- 00:08
Girlfriend
This bungee class is fun. Sorry, I want to make fitness enjoyable, Joe.
- 00:12
Joe
I just feel like bouncing around can't be a good workout.
- 00:16
Girlfriend
Okay, have an open mind.
- 00:17
Nathaniel Latrine
All right, what's up, y'all beautiful bitches? Y'all already know, I'm Nathaniel Latrine, the bungee queen. Who's ready to fly?
- 00:25
Class Member
Yeah!
- 00:27
Nathaniel Latrine
Oh, and just like that, there's a man in my class. Consider me distracted.
- 00:35
Girlfriend
Nathaniel, this is my boyfriend Joe. I wanted him to try your workout.
- 00:39
Nathaniel Latrine
Okay, well I hope you're in shape Joe, because as these girls will attest, this workout is not for the faint of heart.
- 00:45
Class Member
True story.
- 00:47
Nathaniel Latrine
Okay, this is your captain speaking. We are landing ahead of schedule at your destination, your dream body. Alright girls, warm up. Make sure you don't tear a muscle. Here we go. And five, four, three, two, one, let's fly! Fly!
- 01:03
Nathaniel Latrine
Yes, girls, fly! Yes! Yes! Okay, now swim! Everybody! Okay, great! Okay, everyone, relax! Relax, relax, relax. Good, good. All right, take a second. We don't want to overdo it.
- 01:22
Joe
Is this supposed to be hard?
- 01:24
Class Member
Uh, is that what your girlfriend said to you last night?
- 01:27
Girlfriend
Literally. Oh my god, I literally did.
- 01:33
Joe
What? Hey. No, it just doesn't feel like I'm working out.
- 01:38
Nathaniel Latrine
Okay, well you might want to check in with the calorie meter. Okay, that's right. Papa those heart monitors like Everything check it out.
- 01:49
Joe
So I burned five calories.
- 01:51
Class Member
No, dude, everyone in here has burned five calories collectively.
- 01:55
Joe
So I've earned less than one calorie.
- 01:57
Nathaniel Latrine
All right, dolls. We are about to show this man what a real workout looks like. Brace yourself. If you have a tampon in push it up an extra inch, because we ain't trying to have any red fishies on the floor. Okay, here we go, ladies. Five, four, three, two, frogging.
- 02:16
Nathaniel Latrine
Frogging, frogging, frogging. Now, troll walk, troll walk, troll walk, troll walk. And jumping jacks, jumping jacks. Just your arms, just your arms. And five, four, three, two, Jimmy Carter, Jimmy Carter.
- 02:33
Nathaniel Latrine
Okay, now relax. Everybody rest. Everybody rest. It's very important. Do not push yourselves. I am begging you. Listen to your bodies.
- 02:44
Joe
My body doesn't feel anything now.
- 02:48
Girlfriend
You really sound like me last night.
- 02:52
Joe
Oh, okay. Okay. I just don't think anyone's overdoing it. I mean, that woman is literally asleep.
- 03:04
Nathaniel Latrine
You're about to be asleep the rest of your life if you don't watch your tongue, twig-armed, twilight-ass bitch.
- 03:10
Class Member
This class is an incredible workout.
- 03:13
Mary-Kate
Yeah, this class is way harder than the class at my gym. What's the one with the hot room with all the towels?
- 03:19
Nathaniel Latrine
Um, that's the sauna, love.
- 03:21
Mary-Kate
Yeah, that one.
- 03:22
Nathaniel Latrine
Anyway, I believe we have a birthday in the house. Mary-Kate, you know I didn't forget, girl.
- 03:27
Mary-Kate
Oh, Nathaniel!
- 03:27
Nathaniel Latrine
Yeah, that's right. We have a Cinnabon's new Frosted Mega Cinnacade.
- 03:33
Class Member
Yeah! This is like heaven.
- 03:35
Nathaniel Latrine
Okay, now focus. Fly to me and grab a bite to the music. Here we go, here we go. Yes, fly, yes, yes, yes, ladies. Yes, yes, get in there. Yes, yes, yes, get in there. Yes, yes, eat it, eat it, eat it, eat it. Eat it! Great! Great! Great! Great! Delicious!
- 03:55
Joe
Okay, I... What is this class? You just bounce around and eat Cinnabon?
- 04:03
Nathaniel Latrine
Oh, sorry, we're not weightlifting like you, Jason Momoa! I hope this doesn't mess up the calorie meter too bad! Yeah, Yep, and it's time...
- 04:14
Joe
Those three bites were 1100 calories?
- 04:17
Nathaniel Latrine
Okay, it's time to work it off, y'all! Now fly! Fly!
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
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