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Naked Noodly-Loo
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.
The setup
Watch on YouTube
Watch onYouTube
The premise
Here’s the bit.
When their friends' email account is hijacked to send spam, Peter and Nance realise nobody has ever tried to hack them and suspect their files are simply too dull to steal. Peter decides the fix is to give hackers something worth finding, so the couple book a professional photographer and pose for an increasingly elaborate series of nude portraits. Back home Peter frets that the plan still has not worked, until a pair of friends open a fresh spam message and discover the couple's photo inside.
The funny people
Meet the cast. 4
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
The kind of photos where someone looks at them and they say out loud, "Jackpot."
Well, Peter, the hackers are busy. You know, they have the whole world to hack.
Behind the scenes
The people who made it.
Lance Bangs
Director
A little extra
Notes from the archive.
IFC posted this sketch online on March 12, 2018, three days before "Long Way Back" premiered on March 15, 2018.
Script
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.
- 00:00
Peter ?
Oh, look, Tuck and Petty just wrote an email. Need a loan? Automatic payment sex. Click link for need.
- 00:06
Nance
Nuh-uh. Don't click on it, Peter.
- 00:07
Peter
Why not?
- 00:08
Nance ?
They clearly got hacked.
- 00:09
Nance ?
Our friends are asking us to click a link for need. That's the worst thing we could do, Peter.
- 00:15
Peter ?
Someone worked really hard. You've got to create a link. You've got to put it in the body of an email. It's a lot of hard work, and we're just ignoring it.
- 00:23
Nance ?
Peter?
- 00:25
Peter
Nance, how come we never get hacked?
- 00:28
Nance
I don't know, hon. Maybe they just think we're boring.
- 00:32
Peter ?
If we get hats, what do you think they'll find?
- 00:36
Nance ?
Well, you've taken all those photos of the scones you love eating.
- 00:39
Peter ?
Yeah, but don't they want something more exciting?
- 00:44
Nance
Like what, Peter?
- 00:50
Peter ?
You know, nude, nude, you know.
- 00:52
Nance ?
For what?
- 00:53
Peter ?
Naked nudie pics.
- 00:55
Nance ?
A naked nudaloo? Peter!
- 00:57
Peter ?
Yeah?
- 00:57
Nance ?
No, I don't think it's about nudes.
- 00:59
Peter ?
If they uncover a picture of my pud or my thigh, This way, at least it's something that's exciting. That's what they're looking for. I don't want to waste their time.
- 01:11
Peter ?
We want these to be the kind of pictures that people who love pornography, even though they'll say, this is too much for me.
- 01:16
Nance ?
Heavy nudity.
- 01:17
Peter ?
Yeah.
- 01:18
Peter
We want the kind of photos where someone looks at them and they say out loud, jackpot.
- 01:23
Photographer ?
Mm-hmm.
- 01:29
Peter
Should Should I smile, Nance?
- 01:31
They're You're going to find these. Maybe we'll act like we don't want them.
- 01:43
They're going to need a bigger lens.
- 01:45
Nance ?
What's What's wrong, Peter?
- 01:55
Peter
Well, it's just frustrating because we still haven't been hacked.
- 01:59
Nance
Well, Peter, the hackers are busy. You know, they have the whole world to hack.
- 02:03
Peter ?
Yeah, I guess you're right. I'm just being selfish. Maybe there's some way we could help them or something.
- 02:11
Nance ?
You know, maybe there is something we could do.
- 02:15
Speaker 1 ?
Oh, damn. It looks like Peter and Nance got hacked.
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
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