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Lord of the Rings
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.
The setup
Watch on Vimeo
Watch onVimeo
The premise
Here’s the bit.
In this Lord of the Rings parody from the premiere episode of Open Slather, a mounted commander delivers a grandiose victory address to his weary soldiers. Stephen Curry plays a foot soldier who politely interrupts to suggest they cut down on all the flowery words, pointing out that many of his comrades died in battle before the commander finished his warnings. The soldier goes on to propose that their legend of the ring and the small hairy-footed folk might work as one story instead of six very long ones, and keeps prodding until the commander finally sums up the speech in two words, setting off a rowdy celebration.
The funny people
Meet the cast. 1
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
We are using way too many words, guys.
Next time just yell 'Duck!' I reckon.
I just think maybe just say we won or something.
A little extra
Notes from the archive.
This sketch was highlighted by TV Tonight reviewer David Knox in his review of Episode 1, calling Curry priceless in the role.
Script
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.
- 00:03
Speaker 1
men of rastor my
- 00:06
Speaker 1
My brothers, this day you fought with honor. This day you vanquished those that mean to smite us. The Dark Lord forged his enemies to reap their terror, but we persevered and slayed them forthwith.
- 00:20
Speaker 1
In the years to come, they will sing our victory song as we sung for our forefathers...
- 00:26
Minion
Sorry. Sorry. Sorry, guys. Uh, just one thing I thought I might bring up.
- 00:34
Speaker 1
Whatever is it brother of the watch fellow Kingsman?
- 00:37
Minion
Yeah,
- 00:37
Speaker 1
this one at night of the third men
- 00:39
Minion
This is what I want to talk about. We are using way too many words guys
- 00:44
Speaker 1
How doth thou mean proud warrior of the north brave son of the art there?
- 00:49
Minion
That's what we could really speed things up around here If we just cut down on the wordage
- 00:54
Speaker 1
how so brother of the cloth defender of the nosh
- 00:57
Minion
Well like in battle today when you yelled, I'm paraphrasing, noble horde, raise thy shields, from yonder field of battle approaches, is it thy, enemy's arrows? Yeah, next time, just yell duck, I reckon.
- 01:22
Minion
You know, I mean, a lot of us died before you finished talking.
- 01:29
Speaker 1
So, not speak in such an elongated way for the sake of some time.
- 01:34
Minion
Exactly. Actually, and just while we're on the topic, we were just talking about this, weren't we?
- 01:40
Minion
The tales that we tell, the one about the ring and the short, hairy-foot people, maybe that could be just one story, you know, instead of six three-hour unnecessarily long stories.
- 01:55
Speaker 1
It's our merit you may have in your words, my brother. I see how my verbose retelling may elongate the...
- 02:01
Minion
I don't, I don't think you, you do.
- 02:04
Speaker 1
No?
- 02:04
Minion
Um, yeah, even this. The, the victory speech you're making, I, I, I don't know. I, I just think maybe just say we won or something. You know, you guys, yeah?
- 02:16
Speaker 2
Yeah.
- 02:18
Speaker 1
Your words have resonated deep in my mind, my brother.
- 02:21
Minion
Again, I don't think they, I don't think they have, because you're still, he's still doing it. He's still doing it.
- 02:28
Speaker 1
We won!
- 02:34
Speaker 1
Let's go get fucked up! Yes!
- 02:38
Minion
Yes! That is what I'm talking about!
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
More from across the archive.
