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Holiday Greetings from Kenny Rogers

Mad TV 2001 Season 7 Episode 10

SKETCH-O-VISION

A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.

The setup

Kenny Rogers wishes viewers every holiday under the sun, then brings out his son Benny for a family Christmas tradition that goes off the rails.

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Community rating

– / 10

The funny people

Meet the cast. 2

Highly quotable.

Let's get drunk, Benny, and go piss in the snow.

You may be quicker off the line, but I'm built for speed.

The premise

Here’s the bit.

Standing in front of a decorated holiday set, Kenny Rogers rattles off a scattershot list of seasonal greetings before inviting everyone to meet his family. He calls out to his son Benny, who greets him awkwardly as Daddy and is told to just say Kenny. Benny is pointed to his Kwanzaa stocking, which Kenny insists on rifling through himself, pulling out chicken, booze and more chicken while plugging his own roasted-chicken brand. Kenny then announces a drunken family Christmas tradition. Benny finds nothing left in the stocking, Kenny hurts himself reaching in, and the greeting dissolves into a threatened grounding and a chase around the stage.

A little extra

Notes from the archive.

This holiday greeting aired on December 15, 2001, in an episode that also featured Santa's elves worrying about anthrax in the mail and Trina Moss's nativity-themed skit.

ScriptEnglish · 26 turns

Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.

00:00
Kenny Rogers
Hi, I'm Kenny Rogers. I just want to say happy holidays to everyone, because it's the holidays. So Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanzaa, Merry Buddha Day, Hey, you're trippin'! Flat as tidings on your qua...
00:32
Kenny Rogers
Rastafarian somethin' or other, I don't know. From my family to you!
00:39
Kenny Rogers
Hey! I thought it might be a good idea for y'all to meet my family! Y'all wanna meet my family? Hey! Hey, Stan! Stan, get out of here!
01:00
Benny Rogers
Hey, Kenny, I'm being daddy.
01:03
Kenny Rogers
Nah, dude, it's cool. You can call me Kenny.
01:05
Benny Rogers
Okay, Kenny.
01:06
Kenny Rogers
All right, Benny.
01:09
Benny Rogers
Hey, everybody.
01:13
Kenny Rogers
Say, Benny, what you got in your Kwanzaa stocking?
01:16
Benny Rogers
I can't open it yet. It's not Kwanzaa.
01:18
Kenny Rogers
Ah, bullshit. Let's have a have a few of these. Let's see. You got... Hey, hey, my favorite, chicken.
01:28
Kenny Rogers
and booze and yes, more chicken, not just any chicken, Kenny Rogers Roaster, it's Cock-A-Doodle-Doodle All right, so now it's time for my favorite Kenny Rogers family Christmas tradition. Let's get drunk, Benny, and go piss in the snow.
02:02
Benny Rogers
Kenny Rogers?
02:03
Kenny Rogers
Yes, Benny Rogers?
02:05
Benny Rogers
You're the best daddy ever.
02:07
Kenny Rogers
I know.
02:13
Kenny Rogers
Happy holidays.
02:15
Benny Rogers
There's nothing in here.
02:19
Kenny Rogers
Ah, son of a bitch, that hurt, you're grounded
02:23
Benny Rogers
No, I'm not
02:24
Kenny Rogers
Why not?
02:25
Benny Rogers
You can't catch me
02:27
Kenny Rogers
Oh, yeah, why's that?
02:28
Benny Rogers
Because I'm going to run in a circle
02:30
Kenny Rogers
Oh, I'm going to get you Get back here, Benny
02:32
Kenny Rogers
You may be quicker off the line, but I'm built for speed I'm going to have a shot