You're tuned to the good stuff
Davey and Goliath II: Pet Cemetery
The setup
The premise
Here’s the bit.
In this claymation spoof of the wholesome Davey and Goliath shorts, Davey has just moved in when a craggy old neighbor warns him about the graveyard past the old pet cemetery, then helpfully points out the shortest route there. When Goliath chases a ball into the road and is flattened by a parade of passing traffic, the neighbor leads a baffled Davey up the hill to bury him. Goliath soon trots home bloodied and announcing that he is evil now, and the neighbor's patience with the uncomprehending boy runs out. Davey heads back to the cemetery armed with a shotgun and the conviction that only Jesus is supposed to return from the dead, finds Goliath has brought along a crowd of undead animal friends, and opens fire. Back home, he cheerfully reports that he buried all the bodies past the old pet cemetery, the one spot guaranteed to send them back, leaving the neighbor exasperated.
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
I'm back, Davey, and I'm all evil now.
The Bible says the only thing that's supposed to come back to life is Jesus.
He's nice enough, young fella, but he's dumber than a bag of hammers.
A little extra
Notes from the archive.
The hand-drawn map and the graveyard's sign both spell it 'Pet Semitary', a nod to the misspelled sign in Stephen King's Pet Sematary.
Script
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors.
- 00:06
Fetch, Goliath
- 00:08
Sure
- 00:10
Sure thing, Davey.
- 00:13
Hello, young fella.
- 00:14
You sure picked a fine day to move into the neighborhood?
- 00:18
Yeah, it's swell out.
- 00:20
Well, whatever you do, stay away from that graveyard up by the old pet cemetery.
- 00:25
What do you mean?
- 00:27
All's I'm saying is, if a fella were to go out there, which he shouldn't, this here's the shortest way.
- 00:33
I got it, Davey. I got the ball.
- 00:41
Goliath!
- 00:42
Darn truckers, darn
- 00:43
Dawn Motorcycle
- 00:47
motorcycle gangs, darn river dancers.
- 00:55
Dead!
- 00:57
goliath's dead
- 01:01
I got a real bad feeling we're headed straight for the pet cemetery with this one.
- 01:07
Problem
- 01:08
hmm.
- 01:20
Problem
- 01:21
is, if you bury an animal up here, they tend to not stay buried.
- 01:26
What do you mean?
- 01:27
Well, for God's sake, son, it's not that complicated.
- 01:31
Your dog's gonna come back to life
- 01:33
because you buried him in the wrong cemetery.
- 01:35
What do you mean?
- 01:41
Hello, Davey.
- 01:43
Huh?
- 01:44
Goliath,
- 01:45
You're alive again.
- 01:47
But how?
- 01:48
It's like I said, you moron.
- 01:51
It's that pet cemetery.
- 01:53
The what cemetery?
- 01:55
Ah, I'm gonna go watch me some monsters.
- 01:59
I'm back, Davey,
- 02:01
And I'm all evil now.
- 02:04
What do you mean?
- 02:05
Throw the ball, and I'll show you.
- 02:08
Okay.
- 02:09
Fetch, boy!
- 02:16
She?
- 02:17
See? I'm all evil.
- 02:20
Gosh!
- 02:21
We'd best get up to that pet cemetery and put an end to this.
- 02:27
Maybe Goliath came up here to this pet cemetery.
- 02:31
He's about this close to getting a hammer to the back of his head.
- 02:36
Hello, Davey.
- 02:37
I've got to kill you Goliath. The Bible says the only thing that's supposed to come back to life is Jesus
- 02:44
First I'd like you to meet my new friends
- 02:48
Davy, what do you mean?
- 02:53
Yo!
- 02:56
I'm unbent, boo-boo.
- 03:03
Now would be a good time to use that shotgun, boy.
- 03:09
Die, die, die,
- 03:10
How'd everything turn out I killed all those devil animals
- 03:22
Even Goliath.
- 03:23
You did good, boy.
- 03:25
What did you do with all those bodies?
- 03:27
I figured as long as I was up there,
- 03:29
I might as well just bury them in that graveyard
- 03:32
up past the old pet cemetery.
- 03:35
He's nice enough, young fella,
- 03:36
but he's dumber than a bag of hammers.
- 03:39
What do you mean?
- 03:41
Ah, go yourself.
- 03:42
yourself.
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
More from Mad TV.
