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Cabana Chat: Joe Rogan
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.
The setup
Watch on YouTube
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The premise
Here’s the bit.
On Cabana Chat, hostess Dixie Wetsworth sends her dim pool boy, who somehow cut his head at an action movie, up a ladder to fix a light before presenting her hand-picked guest, NewsRadio's Joe Rogan, as though he were a prize cut of beef. Every topic, from his sitcom role as an electrician to the tools he brought, turns into a double entendre for Dixie, and Rogan obliges her request for an impression with a loud, lewd Julia Child bit. The pool boy poses a baffling question about crime scenes, and steel-drum bandleader Dexter, overcome by pent-up feelings, takes the spotlight with a song about Rogan's backside before Dixie closes the show.
The funny people
Meet the cast. 4
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
Here he is, uncooked and still on the bone.
They tell you not to touch anything. Does it count if you put a hat on the guy?
He's like a bullet train. It's a great ride, but everyone seems to be speaking Japanese.
Script
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.
- 00:00
Dixie Wetsworth
Oh, my God!
- 00:05
Dixie Wetsworth
Pooley, what happened?
- 00:06
Pool Boy
Did I cut my head? I went to a movie.
- 00:10
Dixie Wetsworth
How on earth did you cut your head in a movie?
- 00:13
Pool Boy
Easy, it was an action movie.
- 00:16
Dixie Wetsworth
Oh dear, he's out there where the buses don't stop. Ah, Cooley, do us a favor. This light bulb is burned out. Be a darling, change it for me.
- 00:26
Pool Boy
Okay. hey Dixie Dixie, there's no lamp up here.
- 00:37
Dixie Wetsworth
Ladies know.
- 00:38
Ah!
- 00:40
Dixie Wetsworth
Paulie, get down!
- 00:42
Ah!
- 00:43
Dixie Wetsworth
Ladies and gentlemen, I personally selected the guest for today's show. I ordered 175 pounds of prime U.S. beef and I did the inspecting. So, here he is, uncooked and still on the bone. Give a warm welcome to News Radio's Joe Rogan. Rogan!
- 01:00
Ah!
- 01:09
Dixie Wetsworth
Hello, Joe. Glad you could make
- 01:11
Himself
Hey, glad to be here. I watch the show every week. And you know what? You're even more beautiful in person.
- 01:17
Dixie Wetsworth
Oh, Joe. There's no need to buy the cow when I'm giving away the milk for free.
- 01:24
Pool Boy
Hi, Joe Rogan from News Radio.
- 01:26
Himself
What's up, pool boy? You know, the steel drums. My man Dexter. What's going on?
- 01:29
Dexter
Oh, he knows me.
- 01:33
Dexter
Joe, I just want to play you like my pan flute.
- 01:36
Dixie Wetsworth
Are you still going to want him after I've squeezed all the toothpaste out of his tube?
- 01:43
Dexter
Well, Ms. Dixon, you usually leave a little at the bottom.
- 01:46
Dixie Wetsworth
Oh, touche, my midnight. and Moore. Now, Now, Joseph, on news radio, you play an electrician. Did you bring all your tools? Please say yes.
- 01:57
Himself
Brought the only tool I'm going to need for this job.
- 02:01
Dixie Wetsworth
Oh, I could talk about your equipment all night, but the show must go on. Now, I hear when you're not busy blowing women's fuses, you're something of a comedic raconteur. Do you do any impressions?
- 02:16
Himself
I do one. This is Julia Child having sex with a raccoon. Ready?
- 02:20
Himself
Oh. Okay, Oh. Oh, oh. That's lovely. Lovely, lovely little friend. Oh, oh. Bon Appetit. Oh. Oh, Joe. Oh.
- 02:47
I can't believe I'm not butter.
- 02:50
Pool Boy
Hey, Joe Rogan from News Radio, I have a question for you. Okay, like, if you come across a dead body, and then you call the police, and they tell you not to touch anything, does it count if you put a hat on the guy?
- 03:05
Dixie Wetsworth
don't mind poorly he's like a bullet train it's a great ride but everyone seems to be speaking japanese
- 03:11
Dixie Wetsworth
why Dexter, your hi-hat's sounding a so sad my brown chocolate eclair
- 03:21
Dexter
i don't know miss dixie i just have all these pent-up emotions and i want to let them out
- 03:26
Dixie Wetsworth
oh for god's sakes dexter don't fight it let it out maestro roll.
- 03:34
Dexter
I don't like big muscles and I don't like your shoes, but don't you got a cute butt, girl, I'm telling you. Now, I don't watch TV, so I don't know your show, but when you turn around, girl, don't you good to go, cause you got a cute butt.
- 03:51
Dixie Wetsworth
Oh, so true.
- 03:58
Dixie Wetsworth
Dexter! I'd hug you, but I might pop the Stitches. That note, that's all the time we have for Cabana.
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
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