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Strangers on a Train
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.
The setup
Watch on YouTube
Watch onYouTube
The premise
Here’s the bit.
In a black-and-white railway carriage, one gentleman proposes that he and a stranger exchange murders to avoid suspicion. Other passengers politely join the arrangement, turning a simple criminal bargain into a problem of matching partners. As the men debate whose wife should be killed by whom, one woman settles the matter with a plan of her own.
The funny people
Meet the cast. 7
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
BASILIA WINKERS
Script
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.
- 00:16
Excuse me.
- 00:17
Yes?
- 00:18
I'd like to murder my wife and I was wondering if you'd like to marry your wife, too
- 00:22
I see
- 00:23
because if you wanted to I could murder your wife and you could murder my wife That way we'd probably get away with it.
- 00:30
Um, yes, very well.
- 00:31
Well, that's splendid Should we swap addresses and telephone numbers?
- 00:34
Yes, certainly
- 00:36
Mr Green ?
Excuse me. I couldn't help overhearing but I'd like to have my wife murdered as well. Would that be possible?
- 00:41
Oh, no, I don't think I could do that. It might get complicated
- 00:44
I suppose I could murder your wife.
- 00:47
Mr Green ?
And I could murder yours in return.
- 00:48
Well, I'd be happy enough just murdering your wife. My wife is a good sort.
- 00:53
I think you'll find it easier if you did murder his wife. Otherwise things will get confusing.
- 00:57
Mr Green ?
Hmm. Very well.
- 01:01
Mr Smith ?
Excuse me. I'd like my wife murdered. And I'm quite prepared to murder someone else's wife if that's what it takes.
- 01:07
Oh, now, wait a minute. It's not quite that straightforward. We're all paired up, as it were.
- 01:13
Oh, unless, of course, would you care to have your wife murdered, too?
- 01:17
Mr Trubshaw ?
Oh, that's not a bad idea, I suppose, but it might be a bit too close for comfort. She's on the train, you see. We're travelling together. It might look a bit suspicious if you were to... Oh, wait, here she comes now.
- 01:56
Mrs Trubshaw
Middleton 451, please.
- 01:58
Mrs Trubshaw
Hello, is that Mrs McGillicuddy?
- 02:00
Mrs Trubshaw
It's Mrs Fleming here. I've just murdered all the husbands. Let's never speak again. Goodbye.
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
More from Harry & Paul.
