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Portuguese Curse Lady: Bananas
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.
The setup
Watch on YouTube
Watch onYouTube
The premise
Here’s the bit.
An old woman in a black headscarf is browsing a street stall of fruit when a man in a beanie grabs the last bunch of bananas from under her nose. Outside the corner shop she corners him and, smiling with ever-growing relish, describes the fate awaiting him: the shop's priests will seize him, cover his head with a cardboard box and leave him sitting outside while they lounge about enjoying a glorious sunset he cannot see. The shopper stands mute through the prophecy until she seals it with a final curse and he wanders off.
The funny people
Meet the cast. 2
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
Bring us the man who took the last bananas, they will say.
A feathery light cardboard box through which the light cannot penetrate.
A little extra
Notes from the archive.
This is the first of five Portuguese Curse Lady instalments in the 2012 series; Steamroller, Glued to a Chair, Car Mending Shop and Closed Laundrette followed in later episodes.
Script
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.
- 00:32
Portuguese Curse Lady
One day the supermarket priests will gather together in a huddle.
- 00:37
Portuguese Curse Lady
Bring us the man who took the last bananas, they will say.
- 00:42
Portuguese Curse Lady
Put a cardboard box down on his head.
- 00:47
Portuguese Curse Lady
A feathery light cardboard box through which the light cannot penetrate.
- 00:52
Portuguese Curse Lady
Put him outside on the chair with a box on his head.
- 00:57
Portuguese Curse Lady
and such a soft evening what the beautiful sunset but not for you the man with the books on his head
- 01:06
Portuguese Curse Lady
leave him there with the books on his head while we supermarket priests have a lazy time lying about and looking at the sunset
- 01:18
Portuguese Curse Lady
ah what a beautiful sunset ah I'm really enjoying it
- 01:25
Portuguese Curse Lady
But all you can see is very close-up, shady car.
- 01:33
Portuguese Curse Lady
Curse you.
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
More from Harry & Paul.
