Bathroom Speech

At a crowded breakfast café with a single cramped washroom, a woman decides honesty is the best policy: she calls for everyone's attention and announces that her visit will not be a quick one. Her apology spirals into ground rules, from an alibi video of game-show bloopers to cover any noises to a ban on rattling the door, plus instructions for her husband Pete to amuse himself with a podcast. When she spots two diners seated right beside the washroom she insists their table be moved, then halts Pete's attempt to help by sharing far too much about his hemorrhoid and the couples counselling it once required. She finally thanks the room and disappears behind the door, only to re-emerge moments later with an anticlimactic update.

Jennifer Goodhue, who plays the server, is also credited as a writer and story editor on this episode.