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A Sick Child's Touching Wish
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.
The setup
Watch on YouTube
Watch onYouTube
The premise
Here’s the bit.
Presented as a sentimental fundraising film for the Final Wish Foundation, the sketch introduces Mateo Cruz, a boy who has outlived his doctors' grim forecasts for a rare blood disease and has only one request: that the rapper Macklemore never come to see him. His parents, Helen and Steve, explain on camera that he took an instant dislike to the musician while watching TV in the hospital, and that no reassurance about Disneyland or anything else would ease his fear of a surprise visit. Wish coordinator Katherine Cielinski spends weeks chasing Macklemore's management simply to ask that he stay away, while friends and neighbours rally with hand-painted banners. When Mateo's blindfold comes off in his hospital room, the crowd celebrates the empty doorway, and Steve reflects that every Macklemore-free day is now a gift. After the foundation's logo, Katherine confesses she secretly likes the rapper and is caught singing his music at the bedside, to the boy's horror.
The funny people
Meet the cast. 2
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
My wish is that I don't want to meet Macklemore.
I mean, sicker than he already was.
When your one wish is to never meet Macklemore, every day that you don't meet Macklemore feels like a gift.
Behind the scenes
The people who made it.
Nicholas Jasenovec
Director
A little extra
Notes from the archive.
Comedy Central posted the sketch on YouTube on July 9, 2019, the night the episode premiered.
Script
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.
- 00:00
Speaker 1
When Mateo Cruz was diagnosed at the age of two with a rare blood disease, doctors said he wouldn't make it to his fifth birthday. And yet here the miraculous Mateo is, six years later.
- 00:17
Katherine Cielinski
When we heard Mateo's amazing story, we knew we wanted to make his biggest dream come true. And he knew his wish right away. He didn't even have to think.
- 00:27
Speaker 2
My wish is that I don't want to meet Macklemore.
- 00:33
Speaker 1
Family and friends were immediately touched by Mateo's dream.
- 00:37
Steve Cruz
I mean, what can I say? Our little guy just can't stand Macklemore. And it's not just his music either, as Mateo would say, you know. He just hates the guy's whole vibe.
- 00:48
Speaker 2
I don't like his songs, and I don't think I'll like him as a person. I don't ever want to meet him.
- 00:54
Steve Cruz ?
Okay, Chip. You're gonna see what they can do, okay? No promises.
- 00:58
Katherine Cielinski
When we heard the wish, we weren't sure it would be possible. Macklemore seems like a pretty nice guy and surprising sick kids at a hospital seems like something he'd want to do.
- 01:08
Speaker 3 ?
We were just hoping and praying that when he saw just how little his music meant to our son he'd understand.
- 01:15
Speaker 2
That's me, That's that's my dad, that's my mom and there's no Macklemore.
- 01:27
Steve Cruz
I'll never forget that night in the hospital. Matteo must have been five I think. We're watching TV and he's He's like, Daddy, who's that? And I said, Son, that's Macklemore and Ryan Lewis. They have a song called Thrift Shop. He just goes, no, no, no, no, no. He looked like he was going to be sick. I mean, sicker than he already was.
- 01:49
Speaker 3 ?
That's great. That's really good.
- 01:51
Katherine Cielinski
It was so inspiring to see the whole town come together to help make Mateo's wish come true.
- 01:57
Speaker 3
When all this started, I said to him, you do know nobody would ever make you meet Macklemore, right? He's not even that big right now. And he was like, I just want to play it safe. I want a guarantee.
- 02:09
Steve Cruz
And we were like, you know, you can have whatever you want. You know, if you wanted to live in Disneyland for a month, they could probably make that happen. And you would still probably never meet Macklemore. But then he said, Dad, what if Macklemore is at Disneyland? I hadn't thought of that.
- 02:27
Speaker 1
After weeks of calling, Catherine finally connects with Macklemore's managers.
- 02:32
Katherine Cielinski
Yep, just don't visit him and don't surprise him. Yep, that's all. Thank you so much. Okay, he's not coming.
- 02:47
Steve Cruz ?
Okay, buddy. Time to take off that blindfold, okay?
- 02:51
Speaker 3 ?
He's not here. He's He's really not here. Macklemore's never coming, honey. Not now, not later, never.
- 03:08
Steve Cruz
And that's when I realized that all the other kids have it wrong by wishing for vacations or a ticket to a big game. When your one wish is to never meet Macklemore, every day that you don't meet Macklemore feels like a gift.
- 03:19
Katherine Cielinski
you know this was an especially difficult job for me because I actually kind of like Macklemore downtown oh I'm sorry kiddo I thought you were asleep
- 03:34
Speaker 2 ?
just let me die
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
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