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Control and Tony
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.
The setup
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The funny people
Meet the cast. 2
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
I've been told that if I want to stay fit, I have to walk at least ten miles a day.
Yes, you splendidly did.
No, Tony, I'll fetch you one. It's my turn.
The premise
Here’s the bit.
Tony Murchison arrives on the seventh floor to find Control pacing his office: his doctor has prescribed ten miles of walking a day, and Mrs Control makes sure he wears his new pedometer. Once the fitness talk runs dry, Tony recalls the minister's demand for an all-out hunt for whoever has been bombing government departments, then reports that Special Branch, helped by undercover agents, has arrested the cell responsible. Every exchange comes with stiff courtesy and needlessly complete exposition, each man recapping facts the other already knows. Delighted, Control insists it is his turn to fetch the coffee, since the extra walk will impress his wife.
Behind the scenes
The people who made it.
A little extra
Notes from the archive.
Listed in series one rundowns as "Spies Four", the fourth Control and Tony sketch after earlier instalments in episodes two, three and four.
Script
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.
- 00:01
Oh,
- 00:18
Tony Murchison
Hello, Control, something up.
- 00:22
Control
Well, it's the oddest thing, Murchison, but I've been told that if I want to stay fit, I have to walk at least ten miles a day.
- 00:30
Tony Murchison
Ten miles?
- 00:31
Control
Hmm.
- 00:31
Tony Murchison
But you've always been as fit as a flea, Control. Or a fiddle at any way. One of the fittest men in the service you've been occasionally referred to as.
- 00:41
Control
Have a look at this, then, Tony.
- 00:43
Tony Murchison
What is it?
- 00:44
Control
Well, that's what I asked myself when the doctor gave it to me and then I asked the doctor and he said it's a pedometer
- 00:53
Tony Murchison
a pedometer
- 00:54
Control
yes it measures how many miles I walk come on mrs. control is jolly careful to make sure I put it on every day worse luck
- 01:03
Tony Murchison
still I suppose she only has your best interests at heart
- 01:07
Control
that's true I shouldn't grumble after all Tony
- 01:10
Tony Murchison
control
- 01:10
Control
she's only being so quite firm about it for my own good
- 01:14
Tony Murchison
mmm
- 01:14
Control
any golly way I think that's enough for one morning and you didn't come here to listen to my woes
- 01:22
Tony Murchison
oh I don't know they're quite interesting woes
- 01:24
Control
what does bring you to the seventh floor Tony
- 01:27
Tony Murchison
well control do you remember the minister asking us to jolly well hurry up and find out who was behind these bombs that have been going off in government departments of lately
- 01:36
Control
yes indeed I do remember an urgent a1 top priority investigation was called for
- 01:42
Tony Murchison
as I remember there was to be telephone tapping surveillance everything and no limit on the budget the minister said I want you to pull all the stops out on this one control if you'd be so kind
- 01:57
Control
yes it was quite a to-do as I recall Tony I put you in charge of that investigation is that right
- 02:05
Tony Murchison
yes you splendidly did
- 02:06
Control
well have you come up with something that might be regarded as a clue or better still concrete evidence that might lead to some arrests
- 02:13
Tony Murchison
yes well that's really the reason I popped in and surprised you at your walking control because I just had a report from commander Henderson of special branch
- 02:23
Control
that's the Scotland Yard branch that was set up specifically to deal with subversion and counterinsurgency earlier this century
- 02:30
Tony Murchison
I imagine quite strongly it might be
- 02:35
Tony Murchison
yes well they say that with some of our agents working undercover alongside them they managed to arrest a cell of men and women who they think they can prove are responsible for the whole sorry wave of unfortunate and exasperating bomb attacks.
- 02:48
Control
It was a sorry wave, wasn't it?
- 02:50
Tony Murchison
Yes, it certainly was.
- 02:52
Control
Well, this is good news, I must say.
- 02:54
Tony Murchison
I thought you'd be pleased.
- 02:56
Control
I am. Most pleased. Well done, Tony. Full marks. Calls for a coffee, wouldn't you say?
- 03:06
Tony Murchison
It most certainly does. I'll fetch you one.
- 03:10
Control
No, Tony. I'll fetch you one. It's my My turn.
- 03:13
Tony Murchison
Well, goodness, Control. Thank you.
- 03:15
Control
No thank you, Tony. White, no sugar, I think it is.
- 03:19
Tony Murchison
That's exactly right. This really is excessively kind of you, Control.
- 03:23
Control
Not at all, Tony. And besides, the extra walk will impress Mrs Control.
- 03:29
Tony Murchison
Oh, you.
- 03:31
Control
Back in a mo.
- 03:32
Tony Murchison
Bye.
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
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