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Oxbridge Admissions Committee

Tracey Breaks the News2017Season 1Episode 1
Tracey Breaks the News
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.

The setup

Oxbridge launches a diversity drive with an admissions team struggling to conceal its snobbery.

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Community rating

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The premise

Here’s the bit.

Two university representatives appeal to applicants who fall outside the traditional Oxbridge intake. Their polished recruitment pitch repeatedly slips into class prejudice, and even their supposedly relaxed entry requirements demand exceptional achievements. An invitation to bring friends exposes just how limited their enthusiasm for change really is.

The funny people

Meet the cast. 2

Say it with us

Highly quotable.

What is Lidl?

Steady on. I mean, we only need one or two.

ScriptEnglish · 13 turns

Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.

  1. 00:03

    Admissions Committee Member (Man) ?

    Hello, are you black poor from the north or preferably all three?

  2. 00:08

    Admissions Committee Member (Woman) ?

    Then we at the Oxbridge admissions committee want to hear from you for centuries Oxford and Cambridge universities have educated only the richest whitest most already educated students

  3. 00:21

    Admissions Committee Member (Man) ?

    But we don't want to do that anymore.

  4. 00:23

    Admissions Committee Member (Woman) ?

    Well, we do want to but apparently it looks bad

  5. 00:26

    Admissions Committee Member (Man) ?

    So if you think Eaton is a character from Hollyoaks

  6. 00:30

    Admissions Committee Member (Woman) ?

    or nanny is a type of crystal meth

  7. 00:33

    Admissions Committee Member (Man) ?

    Then pick up an application form from your local branch of Lidl.

  8. 00:36

    Admissions Committee Member (Woman) ?

    What is Lidl?

  9. 00:37

    Admissions Committee Member (Man) ?

    And remember, you don't have to get five A stars at A level to get into Oxbridge.

  10. 00:42

    Admissions Committee Member (Woman)

    For example, this helpfully ethnic young lady got in with just three A's and a Nobel Peace Prize.

  11. 00:48

    Admissions Committee Member (Man) ?

    So if you're a normie, apply today. And why not tell all your friends to apply as well?

  12. 00:53

    Admissions Committee Member (Woman) ?

    Steady on.

  13. 00:54

    Admissions Committee Member (Man) ?

    I mean, we only need one or two.

The rabbit hole continues

One more couldn’t hurt.

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