News Anchor

Carol Burnett introduces guest Tim Conway as Paul Bedford, an anchorman whose station boasts that it reads every story the instant it comes off an in-studio news machine. When the machine jams on air, Bedford stalls, then gamely reads whatever scraps reach him: a bulletin about the machine itself, a weather report with no weatherman, a tax story that trails off, and sports scores with no teams attached. He misses his cue for a commercial, opens the phone lines for viewers' questions, and ends up taking a personal call about groceries on the air before signing off with a hopeful motto.

This sketch was Tim Conway's first appearance on The Carol Burnett Show. He was a frequent guest for eight seasons before joining the cast as a regular in 1975.