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Barry Crisp: Swim with a Great White Shark
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.
The setup
Watch on YouTube
Watch onYouTube
The premise
Here’s the bit.
On a marina dock, Barry Crisp is selling a fifty-pound chance to swim with a great white shark. The customer soon learns the arrangement involves no open water: the shark, named Owen, is already locked in a cage floating beside the dock, and the customer is meant to climb in with it. Barry explains that nobody could say what a non-native shark might do if let loose, admits the furious animal hates being confined, and concedes that the cage is big but the shark is bigger. He refuses to rent out diving gear in case it is damaged in a shark attack, then lets the customer talk himself into believing the shark will be more frightened of him. As the customer pulls on a wetsuit and flippers, Barry pockets the cash, announces he will be away for half an hour, and declines to stay and watch.
The funny people
Meet the cast. 2
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
I'm in the cage and the shark's in the cage. The same cage.
Well, they're not native to the UK, mate.
It's probably a lot more scared of you than you are of it.
Behind the scenes
The people who made it.
David Kerr
Director
Gareth Edwards
Producer
Script
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.
- 00:00
Barry's Punter
Wow, swimming with a great white shark. How does that work?
- 00:03
Barry Crisp
Well, get in the cage, a cage goes down in the water, and you swim with a great white shark. It's the authentic experience.
- 00:11
Barry's Punter
How do we know we'll find a great white shark?
- 00:14
Barry Crisp
Cos there's one in the cage.
- 00:16
Barry's Punter
Yeah, I'm in the cage and the shark's in the cage. The same cage.
- 00:20
Barry Crisp
Well, they're not native to the UK, mate. If I let the shark out of the cage, who's to say what it'll do?
- 00:27
Barry's Punter
Right, so I go in the cage, does it mind being in the cage?
- 00:33
Barry Crisp
Too right it does. It hates being in the cage. It's rushing around the cage, desperate to get out of the cage, destroy anything else in the cage. Stop it, Owen! So, do you want to get in the cage? Only 50 quid.
- 00:53
Barry's Punter
Er... Yeah, all right.
- 00:56
Barry Crisp ?
Really?
- 00:57
Barry's Punter
Yeah, I mean, you know, it's all fine, isn't it? It's all proper. You've got a sign. It's all fine.
- 01:01
Barry Crisp ?
Oh, yes, it's all fine. Yeah, yeah, you in the cage, the shark in the cage. It's all fine. You basically just want to keep out of its way.
- 01:11
Barry's Punter
Is it a big cage?
- 01:12
Barry Crisp
Uh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, it is quite a big cage, yeah, but then it is a very big shark.
- 01:20
Barry's Punter
Well, can you hire me some gear?
- 01:22
Barry Crisp
I can sell you some gear. I can't hire it to you, and I'll tell you for why, it might get damaged.
- 01:28
Barry's Punter
What by?
- 01:30
Barry Crisp
Erm, shark attack. Yeah, that kind of thing.
- 01:35
Barry's Punter
I mean, the shark's not going to attack me.
- 01:37
Barry Crisp
Really? Oh, that's good.
- 01:38
Barry's Punter
What?
- 01:39
Barry Crisp
Well, I imagined it would. That massive angry shark, cooped up in the cage, someone else gets in the cage, I thought it might lash out. But no, no, you're probably right, it's probably a lot more scared of you than you are of it. Poor thing. Right, well, you know where everything is. Once you get down there, it'll all be pretty straightforward. I'm just going to pop off for half an hour.
- 02:04
Barry's Punter
Oh, you're going to stay and watch?
- 02:06
Barry Crisp
I'd really rather not.
- 02:09
Barry's Punter ?
OK.
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
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