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Today Show: Hoedown
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.
The setup
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The premise
Here’s the bit.
Kathie Lee Gifford keeps hijacking the fourth hour of Today with songs and jokes at Hoda Kotb’s expense. A Snuggie demonstration and the introduction of a runway expert give her more opportunities to derail the broadcast. Their guest, Miss B, tries to teach the hosts a confident catwalk strut, but Hoda falls and studio equipment crashes around Kathie Lee, who keeps performing through the chaos.
The funny people
Meet the cast. 3
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
I went to journalism school.
A little extra
Notes from the archive.
In a May 2009 interview with The Advocate, Bradley Cooper recalled that playing runway trainer Miss B felt natural to him.
Script
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.
- 00:02
From NBC News, this is Today with Kathie Lee Gifford and Hoda Kotb.
- 00:08
Hoda Kotb
Welcome to the fourth hour of the Today Show. I'm Hoda Kotb.
- 00:17
Kathie Lee Gifford
And I'm Kathie Lee Gifford. Yo, yo, yo, Kaylee in the house, you heard? Oh, delicious, you look exhausted today.
- 00:29
Hoda Kotb
No, no, wide awake. I got plenty of sleep.
- 00:32
Kathie Lee Gifford
You could have fooled me.
- 00:33
Hoda Kotb
Oh.
- 00:34
Kathie Lee Gifford
Can someone dim the lights, huh? Can someone put some Vaseline in the lens? I mean, it's like the movie Cocoon over here.
- 00:39
Hoda Kotb
Oh. Well, I think we look great.
- 00:43
Kathie Lee Gifford
No, we don't. No, we don't. We look like California raisins.
- 00:46
Hoda Kotb
Oh.
- 00:46
Kathie Lee Gifford
Or prunes. Come on. Come on. Look them on her. We look like California raisins, except minus the Ray-Bans and saxophones.
- 00:54
Hoda Kotb
Oh, come on. Please. I don't.
- 00:58
Kathie Lee Gifford
I mean, what are we, Benjamin Button and Yoda over here, huh? Yoda coffee? It's not her fault. It's the lighting. It's the lighting. Come on, guys. Get it together over here.
- 01:09
Hoda Kotb
What? Well, somebody's had a lot of coffee today.
- 01:13
Kathie Lee Gifford
you're damn right I've had a lot of coffee 2 30 in the morning I hear this commotion I don't know what it is it's frying oh he is in the downstairs guest room pants around his ankles and he's about to urinate in the mini fridge
- 01:25
Hoda Kotb
that that's weird
- 01:29
Kathie Lee Gifford
no it's not no no it's not and if you had a man in your life go down you'd understand that sometimes these things happen okay I sleepwalk every day except I don't call it sleepwalking I call it white wine walking mama loves the grape
- 01:44
Hoda Kotb
okay let's get to the Hollywood to the scoop let's just go some scoop come on
- 01:53
Kathie Lee Gifford
aye aye matey yo ho hoda and a bottle of rum
- 01:56
Hoda Kotb
okay so you've you've seen these everywhere they're all over TV it's called a snuggie
- 02:06
Kathie Lee Gifford
It is.
- 02:07
Hoda Kotb
And what it is, is it's basically a blanket with sleeves.
- 02:11
Kathie Lee Gifford
What? What?
- 02:12
Hoda Kotb
There you go. It's for when you're lying on your couch at night and you get a little chill.
- 02:17
Kathie Lee Gifford
That doesn't happen.
- 02:18
Hoda Kotb
And you reach for a blanket.
- 02:19
Kathie Lee Gifford
No one does that.
- 02:21
Hoda Kotb
But if you have to move your arms.
- 02:23
Kathie Lee Gifford
Why? Why?
- 02:23
Hoda Kotb
Anyway, it's a blanket.
- 02:25
Kathie Lee Gifford
No.
- 02:25
Hoda Kotb
And it's got sleeves.
- 02:26
Kathie Lee Gifford
Okay, no. No. Okay. No, thank you.
- 02:28
Hoda Kotb
Okay. Alright, so. So I guess we're going to just move on to some other scoop, some Hollywood scoop.
- 02:38
Kathie Lee Gifford
Let's go. Like, totally.
- 02:40
Hoda Kotb
Okay, so Christian Bale, this Dark Knight, this Batman guy, what an angry, irrational tirade. He just went crazy to a lighting person on the set of his latest movie, and someone caught it on tape.
- 02:54
Kathie Lee Gifford
You know what? I'm going to say something a little surprising here. I totally understand where Christian Bale is coming from.
- 03:00
Hoda Kotb
That's not surprising.
- 03:04
Kathie Lee Gifford
As you all know, I did a three-episode arc on That's So Raven. And if you can believe it, the lighting over there is worse than it is here. And just like with Hoda, you gotta light Raven and I differently because black don't crack and you gotta light white right. That aside, I'm high as a kite.
- 03:29
Hoda Kotb
I went to journalism school.
- 03:32
Kathie Lee Gifford
No, you didn't.
- 03:33
Hoda Kotb
Yeah, I did.
- 03:34
Kathie Lee Gifford
No, you didn't.
- 03:34
Hoda Kotb
Well, let's just bring out our first guest.
- 03:37
Kathie Lee Gifford
Whatever.
- 03:38
Hoda Kotb
You've seen him on such shows as Project Runway, What Not to Wear, 50 Years Younger, Split Ends, Kimora, Glam Gods, America's Next Top Model.
- 03:48
Kathie Lee Gifford
I love that.
- 03:48
Hoda Kotb
And the list, it just goes on and on. He teaches ladies how to walk like a supermodel.
- 03:54
Kathie Lee Gifford
What? Oh, look out, Hoko. He's cute. Hoda say, ni so ho ho. No, she no ho. No, she no ho say that.
- 04:00
Hoda Kotb
So please welcome Mr. B.
- 04:02
Kathie Lee Gifford
Come on.
- 04:03
Miss B
Hi, ladies. Hi, ladies. Hi, ladies. How are you? How are you?
- 04:09
Kathie Lee Gifford
Ooh!
- 04:11
Miss B
Okay, oh, and actually, no, it's Miss B, and let me tell you something. Don't let anybody tell you this show isn't terrible, because Miss Things, it is sublime.
- 04:21
Kathie Lee Gifford
No, it's not.
- 04:21
Hoda Kotb
Thank you. Now, you're gonna show us how to strut our stuff on the catwalk.
- 04:26
Kathie Lee Gifford
Ooh, shagadelic, bye-bye.
- 04:28
Miss B
All right, girls, watch this.
- 04:31
All right.
- 04:32
Miss B
All right, what you need to do is you just need to walk like your panties are filled with hot grits.
- 04:37
Kathie Lee Gifford
Oh, that leaves a scratch.
- 04:38
Miss B
Sik-a-joo, sik-a-joo, scratch. Sik-a-joo, sik-a-joo, sik-a-joo, scratch.
- 04:44
Hoda Kotb
All right, let's do it.
- 04:45
Kathie Lee Gifford
Okay, okay. Oh, these are steep steps.
- 04:47
Miss B
There we go, let's go.
- 04:48
Hoda Kotb
Okay, okay.
- 04:48
Miss B
All right, here we go. There we go, okay. All right, let's do it.
- 04:51
Kathie Lee Gifford
Look, I'm Kate Moss, the sandwich.
- 04:56
Miss B
All right, you need to work it, you need to twerk it, you need to freak it, and you need to tweak it.
- 05:01
Kathie Lee Gifford
Tweak it, not leak it, Hoda. Hoda, cut one, everyone. Cut one, cut one, cut one, cut one.
- 05:06
Miss B
All right, OK, girls. Give me a little bit of room here. Just a little bit of room. OK, yeah, no. All right, just shake your butt. Shake your butt like you're just, like you're just, like you're trying to make them loose.
- 05:14
Hoda Kotb
Oh.
- 05:15
Miss B
Oh, it's a little too much.
- 05:16
Kathie Lee Gifford
Hoda's down. We got a ho down. It's the Hoda Roda killer.
- 05:24
Miss B
Oh, Kathleen, just keep moving, you big old slut.
- 05:27
Kathie Lee Gifford
I'm all right. Thank you. I'm all right.
- 05:29
Miss B
You don't look alright.
- 05:30
Kathie Lee Gifford
These lighting guys are a bunch of dummies.
- 05:33
Miss B
How is she okay from that?
- 05:40
Hoda Kotb
We'll be right back with Fajitas 101 with Chef Bobby Flay.
- 05:45
Miss B
Seriously, how does she not die?
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
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