Protective Mom

Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.

1. 00:01
   

   Luis Gonzalez

   Babe, so before we go in I just want you to know that my mom can be pretty protective of me And I just don't want you to get scared off.

2. 00:08
   

   Britney

   Louis. Don't worry. We're good.

3. 00:10
   

   Luis Gonzalez ?

   Okay? Whoa, Mommy Minda, we're home!

4. 00:41
   

   Luis Gonzalez

   Well, I love you too mama, and I want to introduce you to my new girlfriend, Brittany.

5. 00:47
   

   Britney

   Hi. Yes, Miss Flores. I'm Brittany I've heard so much about you.

6. 00:51
   

   Claudia Flores

   Mmm. You are cute. You dress like a boy. I like that

7. 00:56
   

   Luis Gonzalez

   Um, ha-ha, Mama. Let's eat. How about that, huh?

8. 00:59
   

   Britney ?

   With love. And hey, my parents taught me never to come empty-handed, so I did bring some vegan sliders.

9. 01:05
   

   Claudia Flores

   Luis, ella está loca. Yo cociné para todo. Esta niña viene a mi casa con vegan sliders.

10. 01:11
    

    Britney ?

    I, um, is she talking about me?

11. 01:13
    

    Luis Gonzalez

    Uh, yes, but in a good way. Don't worry. Uh, Mama, we're hungry, huh?

12. 01:17
    

    Britney

    Yes, and this looks great. Um, where should I put these?

13. 01:19
    

    Claudia Flores

    I'll take it. Thank you. Ven, ven, ven. Sí, sí, sí.

14. 01:39
    

    Luis Gonzalez

    Uh, everything looks so great, Mama.

15. 01:42
    

    Claudia Flores

    Thank you. So, Brittany, what are you studying?

16. 01:45
    

    Britney

    Um, I'm actually studying fine art with a concentration in 17th century Baroque architecture.

17. 01:51
    

    Claudia Flores

    So she doesn't like money?

18. 01:54
    

    Luis Gonzalez

    Mamá, please. Brittany wants to be an art professor one day.

19. 01:58
    

    Britney ?

    Yeah.

20. 01:58
    

    Claudia Flores

    Oh, so she's a lesbian?

21. 02:02
    

    Luis Gonzalez

    Mamá, please.

22. 02:03
    

    Claudia Flores

    No, no, no, no, no. Mi nuera no puede estudiar fine art y usar tu dinero para decir Baroque architecture.

23. 02:16
    

    Britney

    Okay, so she's talking about me?

24. 02:29
    

    Britney

    Okay, oh my gosh. Listen, I am so sorry if I offended you in any way. I only want the best for your son. Like, Lewis, do you remember when you were having trouble concentrating first semester?

25. 02:40
    

    Luis Gonzalez

    Oh, no, no, no.

26. 02:42
    

    Britney

    And I set you up with my family doctor.

27. 02:46
    

    Claudia Flores ?

    What?

28. 02:47
    

    Britney

    Well, I helped Lewis out. Now he's on ADD medication, and he's doing a lot better.

29. 02:53
    

    Claudia Flores

    My son don't have ADD. He just like to jump.

30. 03:00
    

    Britney ?

    He isn't anything to be embarrassed about. Demi Lovato has it.

31. 03:08
    

    Claudia Flores

    Ella entra a mi casa con su family doctor hablando de que normalize ADD.

32. 03:13
    

    Britney

    Okay, she hates me.

33. 03:15
    

    Luis Gonzalez

    She's not talking about you. Mamá, yo entiendo que no te cae bien su unisex apparel.

34. 03:20
    

    Britney ?

    What?

35. 03:22
    

    Luis Gonzalez

    Y si no fuera por ella, yo nunca viera White Lotus.

36. 03:25
    

    Claudia Flores

    Esta boquita con su Pinterest hablando de que, hey man, wanna go get some sweet green?

37. 03:32
    

    Britney

    What is she saying?

38. 03:33
    

    Claudia Flores

    Pero no me diga a mí que te vas a casar con ella o tener una relación long-term, okay? No.

39. 03:39
    

    Britney ?

    What?

40. 03:40
    

    Claudia Flores

    A mí no me importa si tú te metes con ella para un one-night stand, hit it and quit it, rip and dip. I don't care. That's okay.

41. 03:51
    

    Britney

    Okay, that was all English.

42. 03:53
    

    Britney ?

    Claudia, please, I would just love to start over.

43. 03:56
    

    Luis Gonzalez

    Yes, can we please just eat, huh? How about that?

44. 03:58
    

    Britney

    Yes, this looks delicious, Miss Flores, but before we eat, Mind if I say Grace?

45. 04:08
    

    Claudia Flores ?

    Grace? Oh, me and Luis. Why didn't you tell me she was a woman of God?

46. 04:16
    

    Luis Gonzalez ?

    Oh, my God.

47. 04:17
    

    Claudia Flores

    Now, where are my grandchildren?