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Murder Show
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.
The setup
Watch on YouTube
Watch onYouTube
The premise
Here’s the bit.
As soon as her boyfriend leaves for the evening, a young woman promises a quiet night of relaxing, then launches with three other women into a glossy pop music video about unwinding with true-crime docuseries. Cutting between cozy apartments and a red-lit stage, they rattle off ever more gruesome cases while doing ordinary chores like folding laundry, eating pizza, paying taxes and texting family, then chase each show with a podcast about the same killer and root for a higher body count. When the boyfriend comes home to a crime scene on the TV, he pitches something even better, cult documentaries, and takes over the song dressed as a headband-wearing, volleyball-playing cult leader. The women happily add cults to the playlist, until one of them confesses she also loves baking shows and gets blank stares.
The funny people
Meet the cast. 5
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
I watch it all while I sit on the toilet
I watch it in the background while I FaceTime my mom
A little extra
Notes from the archive.
SNL Archives lists this pre-taped segment as a music video. Nick Jonas both hosted and was the musical guest on this episode.
Script
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.
- 00:00
Guy
All right, I'm gonna head out.
- 00:01
Girl
Okay, have fun.
- 00:02
Guy
What are you gonna do?
- 00:03
Girl
I don't know, just finish up work and relax.
- 00:05
Guy
Okay, well, don't miss me too much.
- 00:07
Girl
I won't.
- 00:08
Guy
All right, bye.
- 00:11
Girl ?
Finally, he's gone. I have the whole night to unwind. And do a little self-care. The only way I know how.
- 00:24
I'm gonna watch a murder show, murder show. I'm gonna watch a murder show. Netflix, Showtime, HBO, and Daylight. Murder show, murder show. I'm gonna watch a murder show. You too, Bulu, that's my favorite thing to do
- 00:37
Girl ?
Two sisters got killed on a cruise in the Bahamas I'm gonna half-watch it while I fold my pajamas Severed limbs found on a beach in Chula Vista But I just kinda stare while I eat a piece of pizza They dig up somebody Wake me up when there's Munchausen by proxy A bodybuilder chopped up an old lady I watch it while I text my sister about her baby
- 01:02
Murder show, murder show, every type of murder show Late night, true crime, this is my relaxing time Murder show, murder show, I'm gonna watch a murder show
- 01:12
Girl ?
Last night I saw a new one Where they found a cheerleader's head in an old coal mine I watched it while I paid my taxes online Satanic killer on the loose in Texas And I'm on Insta keeping taps on my exes Cannibals who cut out people's flesh and they boil it I watch it all while I sit on the toilet Six pretty girls got scalped at the prom I watch it in the background while I FaceTime my mom And as soon as I'm done, I listen to a podcast About the same guy as the show I just watched Cause now I'm fully down the rabbit hole
- 01:48
I hope for a body count, like six or seven A really high body count, ten or eleven Fifteen, sixteen, now it's getting interesting If it's not at least twenty, then girl, he ain't worth it
- 02:01
Guy ?
What the hell?
- 02:02
The second body was found in the forest museum.
- 02:04
Guy
Have you just been watching murder shows all night?
- 02:06
Girl
Uh, yes.
- 02:07
Guy
I do realize there's a type of show that's even better than murder shows, right?
- 02:10
Girl
Wait, what?
- 02:11
Guy
Oh, yeah. Have you heard about cold shows, cold shows? Different kinds of cold shows We were sex and ugly dudes And a bit of volleyball Disco, sex, go
- 02:22
Murder shows and cold shows
- 02:25
Girl ?
And don't forget baking shows
- 02:27
What?
- 02:28
Girl ?
I like baking shows. Whatever, screw you guys. I mean, all of them.
- 02:32
Butter show.
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
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