The Shoemaker and the Elves

Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.

1. 00:01

   After enjoying many nights of assistance from the magical elves, the shoemaker awoke to find an unpleasant surprise.

2. 00:08
   

   Shoemaker ?

   time Time to see what the elves have left. What is this? This is odd. Just one half-done boot. This is not like them. Our family will go hungry.

3. 00:29

   Elf ?

   Master Shoemaker, we are here to serve. What seems to be the problem?

4. 00:34
   

   Shoemaker ?

   It's just that this is not like you. I-I feel like you're letting me down a little bit.

5. 00:39

   Elf ?

   Oh, no.

6. 00:42

   Elf ?

   So sorry. That was not our intention at all.

7. 00:47

   Elf ?

   No, sir.

8. 00:49

   Elf ?

   Probably the best thing to do is to teach her some kind of a lesson. You know, so we get the message.

9. 00:55

   Elf ?

   Yeah, like some sort of punishment.

10. 01:01
    

    Shoemaker ?

    Punishment? Like... like what?

11. 01:03

    Elf ?

    What? Whatever you think is fair. It could be physical.

12. 01:10

    Elf ?

    Yeah, like some kind of physical discipline.

13. 01:14
    

    Shoemaker ?

    Look, that's not my style. Why don't I just say try harder and then leave it at that?

14. 01:21

    Elf ?

    Oh, so no punishment?

15. 01:23
    

    Shoemaker ?

    No, just do better.

16. 01:26

    Elf ?

    We won't let you down, Mr.

17. 01:40

    Elf ?

    Good morning, Mr. Cobbler.

18. 01:43
    

    Shoemaker ?

    Good morning to you. you guys this is all you've done I mean you've done nothing

19. 01:48

    Elf ?

    oh no are you kidding we just won't learn will we

20. 01:54

    Elf ?

    how are you gonna handle this sir

21. 01:56
    

    Shoemaker ?

    don't do that this is serious I have customers who need shoes and I don't feel like making them

22. 02:07

    Elf ?

    totally probably calls for some physical punishment

23. 02:11

    Elf ?

    yeah you must You must be so horny, I mean, mad. If I were you, I'd just grab me by the hair and shake me.

24. 02:20

    Elf ?

    Yeah, and I'd tie me up over here and stuff a crabapple in my mouth.

25. 02:25

    Elf ?

    Then take a paddle and crack it across both of our rear ends.

26. 02:30

    Elf ?

    Yeah, I think that would be a good motivator.

27. 02:33

    Elf ?

    That would definitely put a fire under my butt.

28. 02:37

    Elf ?

    Speaking of butts, I wanna go ahead and just flop over here and see if it tempts you to give me the spanking I deserve.

29. 02:47
    

    Shoemaker ?

    You guys, just try it. All right, maybe just one little...

30. 02:53

    Elf ?

    Ha! Harder! Oh, it's gotta be harder. Woo!

31. 02:59
    

    Shoemaker ?

    Oh! Look, forget this is insane. You guys are starting to really make me angry.

32. 03:07

    Elf ?

    It's completely justified.

33. 03:10

    Elf ?

    I guess you're gonna want to go to the restroom on us now.

34. 03:16

    Elf ?

    I guess I'll just unfold this plastic sheet you know to like protect the floor but also to collect it just in case we want to use it for something later I don't know everything is up to you

35. 03:32
    

    Shoemaker ?

    I'm not going to go to the restroom upon you now put that sheet away I'm beginning to regret rescuing you from that windowless cottage at the edges of forest

36. 03:41

    Elf ?

    so act on that act on that

37. 03:43
    

    Shoemaker ?

    frustration look elves come on you don't know how much i want to dominate you both right now i so want to call you both the nastiest of names i can think of

38. 03:58

    Elf ?

    do it do exactly that

39. 04:00
    

    Shoemaker ?

    i want to take my pants off and parade around in front of you in my underwear

40. 04:05

    Elf ?

    great idea i'm making so many pairs of shoes in my mind right now

41. 04:11
    

    Shoemaker ?

    I want to make you call me daddy and then I force you to wash the kitchen floor with sponges on your bottoms

42. 04:18

    Elf ?

    I'm ready to

43. 04:19
    

    Shoemaker ?

    it but alas I can't do any of those things and do you want to know why because I'm married

44. 04:28
    

    Shoemaker's Wife ?

    husband

45. 04:29
    

    Shoemaker ?

    oh no how much did you hear

46. 04:34
    

    Shoemaker's Wife ?

    enough to know that you must choose between me and the elves

47. 04:39
    

    Shoemaker ?

    well you heard her what do you think I should do if you think I should stay faithful to my wife text the number one to 1-800-555-0199 if you think I should sexually dominate the elves text to back later with the the results.