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Thanksgiving with the Keisters
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.
The setup
Watch on YouTube
Watch onYouTube
The premise
Here’s the bit.
With the turkey eaten, the Keister men drift into the living room and collapse: Don sinks into his recliner, his brother Bob takes the other chair, and the three grown sons sprawl across the couch, all groaning about how full they are. Marge, apologizing that dinner wasn't better, shoos the women off to wash up and then keeps coming back with beer, snacks sent out with daughter Susan, an offer of sandwiches and slices of pumpkin pie with whipped cream, insisting it is no trouble at all. The men, barely able to move, accept everything, swap tired jokes about diets and marvel at how good life is, and by the time the game finally starts nearly all of them are drifting off while Marge glows about how alive the house feels with the family together.
The funny people
Meet the cast. 7
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
If you weren't my brother, I'd try to steal Margie from you.
I'm on that seafood diet. I see food, I eat it.
When I see my boys like this, I know why God made mothers.
A little extra
Notes from the archive.
This was the third and last appearance of the Keister family on Saturday Night Live.
Script
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.
- 00:00
Don Keister
Oh, Marge, honey, you outdid yourself.
- 00:03
Marge Keister
Oh, I don't know. Now, that turkey was a little dry, and I know the rolls could have been better.
- 00:08
Don Keister ?
Oh, nonsense. It was the best darn Thanksgiving we've ever had.
- 00:12
Marge Keister
Oh, you're the sweetest. Oh, look at what those boys are doing. Donny, Carl, Dwayne, now all of you, come out of there. Donna and Beverly and I are gonna do the dishes. Go on in.
- 00:21
Oh. Oh. Oh.
- 00:24
Bob ?
Oh, Don. Your Your wife's got to be the best cook in Indiana.
- 00:30
Oh, yeah, Mom knows how to cook all right. Oh, you know it. My eyes are bigger than my stomach.
- 00:37
Let's see the games on here.
- 00:40
Bob ?
No, not yet. Well, we might as well just sit here and wait for it to come on.
- 00:52
Don Keister ?
Gosh, that was a great meal.
- 00:55
Oh, boy. Oh, yeah. That's a good idea.
- 01:00
Don Keister ?
You know, you three kids ate like you had a hollow leg. You know what? It's on the wrong station. Oh, don't get up. I got the remote right here.
- 01:12
Marge Keister ?
Would
- 01:14
Woohoo! Hello!
- 01:17
Marge Keister
my boys like a beer with the game? Dwayne?
- 01:20
No, okay.
- 01:24
Marge Keister
Carl, Bob, Donnie.
- 01:25
Cheers.
- 01:26
Marge Keister
Okay, help yourselves, help yourselves. Take it on down there, there you go. And I know my dad wants one.
- 01:33
Oh, yeah.
- 01:35
Marge Keister ?
Here we go.
- 01:36
Don Keister ?
Thank you, darling.
- 01:37
Marge Keister
Okay. I'll be back to check on you in just a minute. I tell you, it's so good to have my boys with me again.
- 01:44
Oh!
- 01:47
Bob
Boy, you're a lucky guy, Don. If you weren't my brother, I'd try to steal Margie from you.
- 01:54
Oh, Oh boy, that felt good. boy, that felt good.
- 02:02
Oh, I envy you that one.
- 02:06
Don Keister
I'm telling you, Bob, diet starts tomorrow.
- 02:12
Bob
Oh, you better believe it. I'm on that seafood diet. I see food, I eat it.
- 02:18
Oh, yeah.
- 02:20
Susan Keister
Hi, guys.
- 02:24
Hi.
- 02:25
Don Keister ?
Hi, kitten.
- 02:27
Susan Keister
Mom sent me out with some bridge mix and some beer nuts for the ball pit.
- 02:32
Don Keister ?
Thanks, sweetheart.
- 02:33
Thank you.
- 02:34
Susan Keister ?
You're welcome.
- 02:35
Call her if you need anything. Oh, that was real sweet of her.
- 02:43
Oh, boy, Dad. this is the life oh yeah don't you wish you could live like this every day oh Oh, yes sir oh it doesn't get any better than this
- 03:02
Marge Keister
would anyone like a sandwich before i put the turkey away well then how about a big slice of pumpkin pie with some whipped cream on it
- 03:12
Uh, all right.
- 03:15
Marge Keister
Okay. Well, why don't I just bring everyone a slice, and you can choose if you want it or not, okay?
- 03:21
Okay.
- 03:23
Marge Keister
And, um, what would you like to drink with your pie?
- 03:27
Another beer.
- 03:28
Marge Keister
Okay. Beer and pie all the way around, then?
- 03:30
Uh-huh.
- 03:31
Marge Keister
Okay, you got it.
- 03:32
Put me up, you sweetheart.
- 03:33
Marge Keister
No, no, no, no, no. Now, it's no trouble I love to do for my family. When I see my boys like this, I know why God made mothers.
- 03:43
Bob ?
Boy, Boy, Don, you got the life of Riley here.
- 03:52
Oh, yeah.
- 03:54
Hey, look there. The game's about to start. Oh, yeah.
- 04:00
Hey, girl. Wasn't this your alma mater?
- 04:03
Bob ?
I I guess guess I'm gonna be the last one that's gonna be awake for this game.
- 04:13
It's gonna be one hell of a game.
- 04:21
Marge Keister
Look at this. Oh, it feels so good to have the family together for Thanksgiving. It just makes the house seem alive again.
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
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