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Bernard Cress Advertises Deathlitas
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.
The setup
The premise
Here’s the bit.
Bernard Cress fondly recalls his days as a boorish detective in a vintage police drama, then admits his career has since drifted into fronting life-insurance commercials. Now he turns that reassuring sales patter to Deathlitas and its Cut Your Losses plan, pitching a luxurious clinic-cum-crematorium, a soothing recliner and a gourmet last meal to older viewers who might be getting in the way. Along the way his dog Benji is quietly put to sleep, and the advert grows ever more candid about how relieved the customer's family and their property equity will be.
The funny people
Meet the cast. 1
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
For a reasonable price, you can pay the ultimate price.
Our nurses humorously refer to them as electric chairs, though, of course, you'll be killed by poison injection.
When you're getting in the way, call it a day.
Behind the scenes
The people who made it.
David Sant
Director
A little extra
Notes from the archive.
Big Talk Studios and Channel 4 Comedy both posted the sketch online, under the titles "Assisted Suicide" and "Assisted Dying Advert" respectively. The episode was released with the full series on Channel 4 streaming on 5 September 2025 and first broadcast on Channel 4 on 19 September 2025.
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
More from Mitchell and Webb Are Not Helping.
