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A Vancome Christmas Carol
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.
The setup
Watch on YouTube
Watch onYouTube
The premise
Here’s the bit.
Styled as a trailer for a FOX holiday classic, the piece opens on a snowy mansion and finds Adam Sandler in plaid pajamas and a red baseball cap, strumming a guitar in bed and singing a goofy Christmas ditty. The Vancome Lady materializes in a white gown as the Ghost of Christmas Past, sent to judge whether he has been naughty or nice. Sandler protests that he only wants to make people happy, but she rips into his childish acting, his wardrobe and his flimsy hit movies, while mock critics' blurbs on snowy title cards cut between the scenes. Sandler finally hits back, boasting that he graduated from sketch comedy to multimillion-dollar films, which leaves her shrieking in horror before the title card promises the movie on Fox in two years.
The funny people
Meet the cast. 2
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
Why come to me? I've never done anything to hurt anybody. I just want to make people happy.
Does Happy Gilmore mean anything to you? Your movies are so thin, they make Calista Flockhart look like Delta Burke.
Not as good as the Alastair Sim version, but just as good as Henry Winkler's.
A little extra
Notes from the archive.
TVDB lists this segment as "A Vancome Carol"; the closing title card reads A Vancome Christmas Carol and promises the film for December 2000 on Fox, two years after the episode aired.
Script
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.
- 00:00
Speaker 1
two america's hottest stars together in a fox holiday classic a christmas carol
- 00:05
Adam Sandler
the Yeah, I don't see it. The ghost of christmas past came here really fast i said who are you she said you're a jew
- 00:20
Vancome Lady
ah you know what i'm
- 00:23
Speaker 1
starring the vancom
- 00:24
Vancome Lady
hi i'm the ghost of christmas past otherwise known as kathy wajanowski
- 00:29
Adam Sandler
why come to me i've never done anything to hurt anybody i just want to make people happy
- 00:35
Speaker 1
she's here to let Adam Sandler know if he's been naughty or nice
- 00:41
Vancome Lady
you not only do you act five but you also dress five that's neat you might soon be getting some hair down there
- 00:48
Speaker 1
char humble says the San Francisco Chronicle
- 00:53
Adam Sandler
what did I ever do to you
- 00:57
Vancome Lady
does happy Happy Gilmore mean anything to you? Your movies are so thin, they make Calista Flockhart look like Delta Burke.
- 01:06
Speaker 1
Good Morning America says, not as good as the Alistair Sim version, but just as good as Henry Winkler's.
- 01:12
Adam Sandler
And what about you, huh? Why did you throw sketch comedy at our... making multi-million dollar films, and you're stealing a sketch about me!
- 01:25
Vancome Lady
Ooh!
- 01:28
Speaker 1
A phantom Home Christmas Carol, coming in two years on Fox.
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
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