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Dead or Un-Dead

The Peter Serafinowicz Show2007Season 1Episode 5
The Peter Serafinowicz Show
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.

The setup

Noel Edmonds hosts a version of Deal or No Deal in which the boxes are coffins and everyone is hoping for a corpse.

Watch on YouTube
Watch onYouTube

Community rating

– / 10

The premise

Here’s the bit.

Peter Serafinowicz's Noel Edmonds presents Dead or Un-Dead from a blood-red studio crypt, where contestant Sarah has already turned down the Undertaker's cash offer and keeps choosing chained, numbered coffins held by her fellow players. Noel chats to each holder, celebrates Nigel's lucky shirt and gets the studio and viewers at home to will a dead result, and the first two coffins open on skeletons to cheers and hugs. Sarah's last hope is coffin 13, which she needs to clear her debts, but the body inside is very much un-dead: a bloodied, bald corpse climbs out, shrugs off a blast from Noel's shotgun and starts eating the host as he tries to cut to a break.

The funny people

Meet the cast. 6

Say it with us

Highly quotable.

Now, Sarah, you turned down the Undertaker's offer of seven thousand pounds.

Five days and he's worn a blue shirt every single day.

Behind the scenes

The people who made it.

ScriptEnglish · 18 turns

Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.

  1. 00:00

    Noel Edmonds

    Welcome back. Welcome back. Now, Sarah, you turned down the Undertaker's offer of £7,000. Now, I really can feel a very positive energy here in the dead or undead crypt tonight. So, will you please choose your next numbered coffin?

  2. 00:32

    Sarah

    Yes, Noel. I choose coffin number six, which is Nigel.

  3. 00:37

    Noel Edmonds

    Cardinal Blue Shirt. five days. Five days and he's worn a blue shirt every single day. How many blue shirts have you got, Nigel?

  4. 00:49

    Nigel

    Four, so I've worn one already.

  5. 00:52

    Noel Edmonds

    I hope you've cleaned it. OK, Cardinal Blue Shirt. Please, would you open that coffin? If anyone deserves this, it's Sarah.

  6. 01:11

    Sarah ?

    Yes! Yes! Yes.

  7. 01:18

    Noel Edmonds ?

    Right. Oh. Mmm. Mmm, Lovely and warm. Lovely and warm.

  8. 01:25

    Noel Edmonds

    That was your lucky blue shirt. We want more of those. We want more of those. Which is it going to be now?

  9. 01:34

    Sarah

    I'm going to choose coffin 19, which is Catherine.

  10. 01:37

    Noel Edmonds

    Now, I want everybody to think positive. Think positive thoughts. I want everybody to think dead, dead, dead, dead. Come on. Dead, dead. That's it. Come on. People at home, on the sofa. Dead. Think positive. Dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead. Catherine, would you open that coffin?

  11. 02:03

    Dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead.

  12. 02:06

    Oh, yes! Oh! Oh damn man! Oh! Oh dear. Oh, dear.

  13. 02:19

    Noel Edmonds

    Have a swig of tea.

  14. 02:21

    Thank you. Welcome. Thank you. Thank you.

  15. 02:26

    Noel Edmonds

    Now, we are down to the last coffin. Number 13, unlucky for some, however, it could mean a life-changing amount of money. a huge amount of money what are you going to spend it on if you win

  16. 02:45

    Sarah

    i've got a massive debt

  17. 02:47

    Noel Edmonds

    well let's hope you can pay those off would you please open the remaining coffin number 13. sarah it's been a wonderful week you're a lovely girl i really I really hope you do manage to pay off those massive debts. Good luck. All right, everybody down. Don't worry. Don't panic. Don't panic. Don't panic. I've got it. Oh, bloody hell. Let's go to a break.

  18. 03:28

    Noel Edmonds ?

    I'm being eaten. I'm being A-turn!