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Tongue Brush

That Mitchell and Webb Look2006Season 1Episode 5
That Mitchell and Webb Look
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.

The setup

Out of new features to bolt onto a toothbrush, a company's marketing team hits on persuading customers to scrub their tongues.

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Community rating

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The premise

Here’s the bit.

The head of a toothbrush company walks his team through a history of tiny product tweaks, from a kinked handle to diagonal bristles to the blue bristles that tell customers when to buy a replacement, each credited with a jump in sales, then demands to know what comes next. With the room stuck and one colleague worried that they have run out of things to put on a toothbrush, an employee proposes getting people to brush their tongues. The boss doubts anyone will bother, but the employee explains that health benefits are beside the point: a scientific-looking spokeswoman warning about grimy tongues, social rejection and a lack of sex will stick in shoppers' minds long enough for them to buy the brush, even if nobody ever uses it. The boss is soon ecstatic at the thought that a public willing to brush its tongue can be made to do anything, and the employee is already one step ahead with a new device aimed at people's ears.

The funny people

Meet the cast. 4

Say it with us

Highly quotable.

People are out there right now buying toothbrushes that we didn't make.

If we can get them to brush their tongues, we can get them to do anything.

Did you know that up to 83% of us hate the shape of our ears?

Behind the scenes

The people who made it.

ScriptEnglish · 17 turns

Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.

  1. 00:00

    Boss

    1994, the year of putting a bit of a kink in the handle. Sales up by 8%. 1997, the year of putting some of the bristles in diagonally. Sales up by 12.5%. 2002, your finest hour, Chas. The year of putting in some blue bristles to tell them when they need to buy a new one. For the first time, people are actually taking orders from their toothbrush. Sales up by 26%. Guys, it's 2006. I have one question for you. What's next? Erm... Chas? No. Come on, guys, this is serious. People are out there right now buying toothbrushes that we didn't make.

  2. 00:47

    Employee #3

    I think we have to realise we may have run out of things we can tell them they need on their toothbrush.

  3. 00:53

    Employee #1

    I think we could get them to brush their tongues.

  4. 01:01

    Boss

    I admire reach gas but they're not gonna brush their tongues

  5. 01:06

    Employee #1

    I think they will if we tell them to brush their tongues they'll brush their tongues

  6. 01:13

    is there any health benefit to brushing your tongue

  7. 01:16

    Employee #1

    I have no idea show me your tongue oh yeah you see dirty he's got a dirty tongue of course he hasn't but you thought he might have and when it's not me saying it but a Scottish brunette in rectangular glasses and a lab coat

  8. 01:31

    Boss

    I think you might have something they might actually brush their tongues

  9. 01:37

    Employee #1

    of course they will did you know that up to 68% of us suffer from dirty tongue over time microscopic anti-tunganoids build up a gritty towering surface which might very well mean that people laugh at you behind your back and secretly find you repulsive

  10. 01:54

    Boss

    I have to market it at men too

  11. 01:56

    Employee #1

    Which might very well mean that that's why you're not getting enough sex.

  12. 02:02

    Employee #3

    So, what, we'd put something on the back of the toothbrush?

  13. 02:05

    Employee #1

    Could do. Doesn't matter. I mean, people aren't actually going to brush their tongues. Trying to brush your tongue makes you wretch, everybody knows that. But when they're buying their toothbrush, they'll forget it. They'll forget everything except the Scottish brunette telling them that's why they're not getting enough sex.

  14. 02:17

    Boss

    They will! They will! They'll brush their goddamn tongues! and if we can get them to brush their tongues we can get them to do anything

  15. 02:29

    Employee #1

    exactly hence this

  16. 02:32

    Boss

    what the hell's that

  17. 02:34

    Employee #1

    did you know that up to 83% of us hate the shape of our ears

The rabbit hole continues

One more couldn’t hurt.

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