You're tuned to the good stuff
Liverboat
SKETCH-O-VISION
A VERY GOOD USE OF YOUR TIME.
The setup
Watch on YouTube
Watch onYouTube
The premise
Here’s the bit.
A riverboat captain joins a poker game where chunks of liver serve as chips. When his supply runs out, he risks his boat to stay in the game, while Kitty tries to keep his obsession from sinking them both.
The funny people
Meet the cast. 5
Say it with us
Highly quotable.
The game's for liver. Are you in or out?
Liver's my life!
A little extra
Notes from the archive.
A fictional western from SCTV’s 30th-anniversary episode. The source clip has a brief tail of The Old Texas Rangers before the Liverboat title sequence.
Script
Automatically generated script; wording may contain errors. Speaker labels are inferred.
- 00:00
Speaker 1 ?
Try to make a break for it, or I'll plug you.
- 00:03
Speaker 2 ?
Liver boat, liver boat shipping, Litter down to New Orleans. Liver boat, liver boat shipping, Liver Friday to fall on a bed of greens. Liver's the cargo and the captain is mean. It ain't time to talk if you know what we mean. Liver boat, liver boat shipping, Litter down to New Orleans. Liver boat!
- 00:19
Card-player
Well, that's it for me, gentlemen. The stakes are just too high.
- 00:24
Cardsharp ?
Somebody thinks point for stakes.
- 00:30
Captain ?
Oh, well, long to know. Let's see here. Tell you what I'm gonna do. I'll see ya, and I'll raise... Will you take credit?
- 00:42
Cardsharp
The game's for liver. Are you in or out?
- 00:47
Captain
What about the Lucy Bell? Now, she's a fine boat. She's worth a lot of liver.
- 00:51
Kitty
Captain Dobbs, you can't bet the Lucy Bell. She's your life.
- 00:55
Captain
Liver's my life! And you stay out of this, Kitty. Well, stranger, what's it gonna be? Will you take my boat?
- 01:04
Cardsharp ?
Okay.
- 01:06
Cardsharp ?
what do you got
- 01:07
Captain ?
full house king's over tens i guess i'll win
- 01:12
Cardsharp ?
not so fast it's four aces you lose it's like i want me a boat
- 01:20
Kitty ?
that ain't liver that's beef kidney you cheated
- 01:27
Cardsharp
well look one intro's just as good as the other i i gotta get going i'll see you later kitty
- 01:39
Captain
Giddy thanks for saving the boat
- 01:43
Kitty
that's all right captain dobbs i just feel sorry for the children kids need a father
- 01:49
Captain ?
oh they'll be all right here or just give them some liver.
The rabbit hole continues
One more couldn’t hurt.
More from SCTV.
