Porcupine Racetrack

1 Star, 1. Poor: Lacks any coherent humor or appeal, failing completely to engage or amuse the audience.2 Stars, 2. Weak: This sketch has few redeeming qualities, with humor that falls flat and performances that don't deliver.3 Stars, 3. Below Average: Lacks consistent laughs, with uneven pacing or humor that doesn't quite land.4 Stars, 4. Average: An ordinary sketch with some humor, but it struggles to leave a lasting impression.5 Stars, 5. Above Average: Decent overall with enough humor to keep it engaging, but not particularly memorable.6 Stars, 6. Good: Solidly entertaining with some great moments, though it may lack some flair to make it standout.7 Stars, 7. Very Good: This sketch has notable humor and creativity, making it a strong and enjoyable watch.8 Stars, 8. Great: Very entertaining with consistent laughs and clever writing that impresses and delights.9 Stars, 9. Excellent: Exceptionally funny and well-crafted, this sketch captures perfect comedic timing and strong performances.10 Stars, 10. Masterpiece: This sketch is a comedic gem, delivering unparalleled laughter and originality that's unforgettable.

A fully-produced musical comedy sketch about a racetrack where porcupines race. Featuring elaborate choreography, original musical composition, and the entire cast of The State singing and dancing. This became one of the most iconic and beloved sketches from the series, often referred to as "the Sgt. Pepper's of The State's sketch canon". MTV initially asked the group not to do the sketch, but they insisted. The sketch depicts various characters at a porcupine racetrack - from regular patrons to gamblers to an orphanage operator who needs a winner or the orphanage will close.

Various roles including racetrack patron
Kevin Allison • Cast
Various roles including racetrack patron
Michael Ian Black • Cast
Various roles including racetrack patron
Robert Ben Garant • Cast
Various roles including racetrack patron
Michael Patrick Jann • Cast
Various roles including racetrack patron
Kerri Kenney-Silver • Cast
Various roles including racetrack patron/Mr. Johnson
Thomas Lennon • Cast
Various roles including racetrack patron
Joe Lo Truglio • Cast
Various roles including racetrack patron
Ken Marino • Cast
Various roles including racetrack patron
Michael Showalter • Cast
Various roles including racetrack patron with dance solo
David Wain • Cast

Porcupine, porcupine, porcupine racetrack. Watch them porcupines go!

It's a marvelous day, at the Porcupine Racetrack. We'll watch them little porkies run. The sun, the track, and porcupines. The recipe for fun.

Racing form Mr. Johnson? Why thank you Jimmy. Here, get yourself a licorice whip.

Have I got a pick for you boys! This porcupine has to win. He's strong and fast and ready. And loaded up with gin.

I'm putting my dough on Lightning, cause it says that he's a sure thing. And the odds are 5 to 4... But boy I hope that he's not slow or otherwise then this here Joe will be back on skid row!

I know that I'm a sinner, but I really need a winner, or the orphanage will close. So God if you're above, and it's orphans that you love, then please help the porcupine I chose.

I'm the slowest porcupine in town, but knowing that don't get me down. It's just that they don't see. So when they blow that whistle, I will move my little bristles cause there's nothing stopping me!