A man visits a police station to report a crime, only to discover that the force has been privatised. Every service now comes with a price tag — filing a report, having a suspect detained, even using the phone. The sketch is a sharp satirical jab at Thatcher-era privatisation policies, imagining a world where public services are entirely driven by profit. The hapless victim finds himself unable to afford justice, while the desk sergeant cheerfully explains the fee structure with bureaucratic indifference.
