An erudite customer, Mr. Mousebender (John Cleese), enters "Ye Old Cheese Emporium" intent on purchasing cheese. The proprietor, Mr. Henry Wensleydale (Michael Palin), seems to have an impressively stocked shop — but has absolutely nothing in stock. The customer methodically works through an exhaustive list of over 40 cheeses, each time being turned away with feeble excuses like "the cat's eaten it." Throughout the sketch, a bouzouki band (led by Joe Moretti) plays in the background while Terry Jones and Graham Chapman dance in bowler hats and business suits. Cleese initially professes delight at the music, but his patience wears thin as the cheese rejections mount. He eventually snaps and demands the music stop. When he finally asks if Palin has any cheese at all, Palin says "yes" — but then "no," triggering his immediate execution. Cleese reflects, "What a senseless waste of human life," dons a Stetson, and rides off into a cowboy segue.
