Psychiatrists

1 Star, 1. Poor: Lacks any coherent humor or appeal, failing completely to engage or amuse the audience.2 Stars, 2. Weak: This sketch has few redeeming qualities, with humor that falls flat and performances that don't deliver.3 Stars, 3. Below Average: Lacks consistent laughs, with uneven pacing or humor that doesn't quite land.4 Stars, 4. Average: An ordinary sketch with some humor, but it struggles to leave a lasting impression.5 Stars, 5. Above Average: Decent overall with enough humor to keep it engaging, but not particularly memorable.6 Stars, 6. Good: Solidly entertaining with some great moments, though it may lack some flair to make it standout.7 Stars, 7. Very Good: This sketch has notable humor and creativity, making it a strong and enjoyable watch.8 Stars, 8. Great: Very entertaining with consistent laughs and clever writing that impresses and delights.9 Stars, 9. Excellent: Exceptionally funny and well-crafted, this sketch captures perfect comedic timing and strong performances.10 Stars, 10. Masterpiece: This sketch is a comedic gem, delivering unparalleled laughter and originality that's unforgettable.

Two men meet in a psychiatrist's office, and immediately begin trying to out-analyze each other in an absurd battle of professional one-upmanship. Each attempts to psychologically diagnose and understand the motivations of the other, with both insisting they are the psychiatrist and the other is the patient. The sketch satirizes the psychology profession and the tendency to over-analyze every interaction. The deadlocked session ends when a third person (Mrs Meddlicott) enters and treats both men as if they are her patients, revealing that they are both actually patients who suffer from the delusion that they are psychiatrists.

Mr Johanssen/Tony
Hugh Laurie • Cast
Mr Windrush/Doctor Windrush
Stephen Fry • Cast
Mrs Meddlicott
Kay Adshead • Guest

This is fascinating. Quite fascinating. Your problem seems to centre around the delusion that you are a psychiatrist and that everyone you speak to is some kind of patient of yours. This is a rare, but not unheard of syndrome.

Perhaps it would help if we talked a little about your mother at this point.

Extraordinary. Very interesting. Why 'Mother'? Was your mother affectionate when you were small?

Affection! Affection. Now perhaps we're getting somewhere. You felt a lack of affection. I wonder if you happen to know whether you were breast-fed or not?

Ah! Ah-ha! Breasts. Already we've focused in on breasts. What are your feeling about breasts, I wonder? Do they frighten you? This is not uncommon.

Lines, interesting, lines. Why 'lines' I wonder? Lines are very male, aren't they? Very forceful. They thrust, they penetrate, don't they? They urge onwards.

At last the layers are beginning to unpeel. Urging, penetrating, maleness, breasts. How often would you say you masturbated?

Yes. I really do think if you don't mind we had better get back to me asking the questions. I think it is important, if you're to be helped, to remember who is the doctor here and who the patient. I will ask the questions.

And I'll pretend to be the patient, all right. That way I can tell from the questions you ask me, what it is that is truly disturbing you. All right. Good.

Your last doctor tried a course of lentizol, I believe? Did you find that helped at all?

Oh, you're both here. I think I'm seeing you first, Mr Windrush. Would you mind waiting outside Mr Johanssen, you're a little early. Rebecca - two cups of tea please.

Extraordinary.

So deep-seated.

Simply fascinating.